Mary Poppins Quits! (Funny or Die)

Practically perfect in every way, except her paycheck.

Mary Poppins Quits with Kristen Bell from Funny Or Die

Doubling McDonalds' Paychecks Wouldn't Raise Menu Prices Much

Not McDonald's food, but one of several facts HuffPo
says the fast food industry doesn't want you to know.

Remember awhile back when the Papa John's founder (John McDoucherson, I think) balked at "ObamaCare," saying it would "force" him to raise the price of his pizzas by 14 cents each? And most rational people thought, "Wow! For 14 cents, the pizza workers can have health care? Great!" Well, except conservatives who for some reason don't want that. Anyway, the point is, nobody is going to cancel their pizza order over 14 cents, and look at all the good that would do.

Presently, McDonalds (and Walmart and others) are all in a twist over raising the minimum wage. Even though doing so wouldn't necessarily hurt business. In fact, it would create a larger base of consumers who can--you know--afford to buy things. What's more, given the big corporations' multi-billion dollar profits, they actually could afford to raise all of their workers' salaries, and still make a profit, just less profit. Or, they could raise their prices. But really, not all that much. Check out the story excerpted below.

And in a sidebar, I'd love a clarification on something. We hear, virtually every quarter, that Exxon-Mobil, BP and Shell have had record-breaking profits. In fact the biggest profits in the history of man. McDonalds makes billions too. A number of companies do. And then there's Walmart, with its handful of very, very lucky heirs. They rake in tens of billions in profits per year, per person! What is it to Alice Walton if she makes $10 billion this year, rather than $20 billion, but her employees can afford to shop in her own store? I'd seriously like to know, where do all of these multi-billions in profits go anyway? How much can Sheldon Adelson, for example, spend before he crumbles to dust? Why do the mega-rich try so hard to get even more mega-rich, while their employees can barely scrape by?

[Excerpt]

Doubling McDonald's Salaries Would Cause Your Big Mac To Cost Just 68¢ More: Study

McDonald's can afford to pay its workers a living wage without sacrificing any of its low menu prices, according to a new study provided to The Huffington Post by a University of Kansas student. . .

Read more at: Huffington Post

Billionaire Koch Brother Thinks Eliminating Minimum Wage Will Help the Poor

Here's my biggest stumbling block: the Koch brothers are already so ridiculously wealthy, they couldn't spend all of their money if the went on a Michael Jackson-sized shopping spree every day for the rest of their lives. And yet, they are on a mission, a constant battle to get more money, by getting the "right" kind of people elected, by influencing elections that result in policies that save them money, make them money, cut their taxes so that they can keep more of their money.

Good grief, what in the world for? These guys could earn an extra billion this year--or lose it--and they wouldn't feel a difference! At least Las Vegas' own troll garden gnome billionaire Sheldon Adelson has Israel as a prime motivating factor behind his political maneuverings. What in the world motivates these guys? And does anyone for even a minute think that the Kochs have any idea what it's like to struggle? What it's like to try to exist on minimum wage? I'm an atheist, but sometimes I wish for a little karma, a little kismet to bite these guys on the ass.

[Excerpt]

Billionaire Koch Brother Says Eliminating The Minimum Wage Will Help The Poor

A conservative mogul worth $43 billion says he knows the secret to helping poor people. According to Charles Koch, the U.S. needs to get rid of the minimum wage, which he counts as a major obstacle to economic growth. . .

Read more at: Think Progress

FOX & Friends: Work Two Jobs, and Expect to Get Minimum Wage!

Skeeve Douchey, from Raw Story

There is a reason that the oddly named FOX & Friends is routinely mocked by Saturday Night Live, and also a reason its "star" Steve Doocey is often maligned as "Steve Douchey." This talentless, insipid crew of "personalities" likely makes more in week or two than a minimum wage worker gets in a year. And yet, the hosts rarely show even mock empathy toward these people. It's right in line with the FOX "News" agenda of supporting corporations, and screw the little guy.

The striking fast food workers that Douchey is talking about work for corporations that make billions in profits. Profit means money above operating expenses, meaning gravy. It's really cool to pay shareholders sweet dividends, and to give your execs fat bonuses. But do these corporations really want to be known as one-step-above sweatshops or slave labor? You'd think in the hyper-competitive fast food industry, one of these guys would make a name for having the best paid, happiest workers. They could even make an ad campaign out of it: We've raised our prices 5 cents on each item, to give our employees a better wage! For no more than a quarter per order, we'll give our workers the best!

But FOX & Friends wants you to suck it up, work two minimum wage jobs, for the good of corporations. They're "job creators" after all. . .

[Excerpt]

Fox News tells striking workers to get two jobs and ‘expect to get paid the minimum wage’

The hosts of Fox & Friends on Friday suggested that fast food workers should stop striking for higher pay and get a second job because the minimum wage “was never meant to be a career wage. . .”

Read more at: Raw Story