For Guys Only: Get to Know Your Nuts (NSFW)

Okay, here's the deal, guys. The girls have a whole genre of "lady calamities" that are best left unsaid by those of us unfamiliar with that sort of thing. But there are also problems of the dude variety that are just as uncomfortable to discuss. The funny part? When we talk medically, full frontal nudity is allowed! Squeee! Kidding. This is serious. Well, semi-serious. Most of us will be okay, and those of us who discover a problemo can likely head off that problem at the pass. Because, seriously guys, which of us isn't intimately familiar with every bump and crevice? If you find something scary, take care of it right away, and things will most likely be fine.
 

Science is Cool: Cricket Cojones!

Remember that AC/DC song, "Big Balls?" Well, it may have just been written for a cricket.


[Excerpt]


Cricket Sets Testicle Size Record

The Tuberous bushcricket's testicles account for 14 percent of its body weight. To put that in perspective, the testicles of a man weighing 200 pounds (91 kilograms) with that ball-to-body ratio would weigh 28 pounds (12.7 kg). . .

Read more at: Live Science

Thanks to Stupid Monkey Planet for the link.

Monkey News: Crazy Chimp on the Loose in LA

Photo from source, Asylum

This post is especially for friend and contributor, Stupid Monkey Planet, who has something of a monkey news fetish. And before you write me a comment, yes I know that chimpanzees are not technically monkeys. But colloquially, they are, so just chill out, OK?

That said, this looks like a pretty wicked chimp, so if you live in LA, watch out! And wear a cup. . .

[Excerpt]






Paranoia Alert -- Chimp on the Loose, May Attack Your Boys

You might think all chimps are lovable third basemen that room with the guy from "Friends." But you'd be wrong -- some chimps have been known to rip off human testicles. That's right, peeling the gooseberries. . .

Read more at: Asylum

"Truck Nutz" to be Outlawed in Florida?

Fads are funny. Sometimes funny "ha, ha" and sometimes funny "peculiar." I'd say this one ranks somewhere in-between. This is one fad that, as far as I know, has not hit Las Vegas yet. And you'd think it would, since we're loaded to the Stetsons with--as The Other Half calls them--Trans-Westites. We've got plenty of "Cowboy Up" bumper stickers, even a few of the Cowgirl variety (mostly on Subarus--you do the math). But so far, I have never seen a set of balls on the back of a truck or car.

My first instinct upon seeing a vehicle with testicles hanging from it would be that the driver really likes low hangers. So I'm thinking that the placement of these little doo-hickeys may be attracting attention to the driver that they are not intended to garner. Though based on my friend Marky's experience, oh yes, they can be had.

So watch out, you Floridians flouting the law--Marky lives in Florida now. . .

[Excerpt]

Florida moves to ban fake testicles on vehicles

TALLAHASSEE, Florida (Reuters) - Senate lawmakers in Florida have voted to ban the fake bull testicles that dangle from the trailer hitches of many trucks and cars throughout the state. . .

Read more at: Reuters