Back to Ohio: Why do the Roads in Central Ohio Suck so Badly?

There was a common joke I heard in my youth, that the state flower of Ohio was the orange construction barrel. Every spring, the barrels would spring up, complicating any work commute in every direction. When I moved to Las Vegas in the early nineties, I realized that it's not a geographic thing, particularly. For the entire two decades I lived in the Vegas valley, I don't remember a time when Interstate 15 didn't have construction somewhere along its stretch through town.

Upon my return to Ohio this year, I had another revelation. There are huge differences between these two places as to what's going on behind those barrels. In Las Vegas, if there is a choke point on a highway, they fix it. If there is too much traffic trying to join or exit a freeway ramp on a daily basis, they build new interchanges, either replacing the existing exits, or adding new ones at different intersections. Complicated pinch points yield astonishing changes, like fly-overs, superstreet intersections, criss-crossing (and high-flying) ramps, extending and expanding roads that were previously inadequate, access roads, express lanes, and other improvements. Yes, Vegas still has The Spaghetti Bowl, and the Rainbow Curve--nobody's perfect--but by-and-large, if a section of town experiences terrible traffic, NDOT goes to great lengths to find a solution, and usually a quick one.

Not in Ohio. Sure, there have been changes. During my 20 year absence, State Route 161 was rerouted and expanded (with the efforts of Limited owner, Les Wexner), I-670 was completed as something of an innerbelt from Downtown Columbus to the Airport (it peters out in the suburb of Gahanna). I'm sure there have been other improvement projects (I saw a novel interchange at Roberts Road and west I-270, for example), and roundabouts have sprung up in both logical and unnecessary locations. Roundabouts seem to be a prestige thing for some reason, even in Las Vegas. But there are a distressing number of congested areas that are absolutely inadequate, and were inadequate in 1990, 1980, 1970.

Many of the freeway exits and junctions, for example, are of the original design: cloverleafs. They force drivers to cross each other, often requiring not only cooperation with other drivers (yeah, right), but also snap decisions. One in particular, at I-270 and State Route 3, allows almost no time to complete the maneuver. It's been that way since it was built. Traffic jams abound, and need have no other cause beyond competing drivers trying to cross each other to exit and enter.

Getting off the freeway, things can be just as bad on surface streets. Traffic jams can happen anywhere, at any time, and have no obvious cause. I can't tell you how many times I've found myself driving on a major road, and having to make a snap decision, because my lane is coming to a sudden surprise end or "turn only." Attempting to drive about three miles down State Route 256 (a major road), I had to change lanes three times to continue south, and this occurred no matter which lane

you're travelling in. Going through the town of New Albany (Les Wexner's baby), there are sequential intersections where through travel requires shifting lanes twice, neither particularly intuitive. I find this all over the place, left lane, right line, or middle lane (if there is one). Even in prestigious areas like Grandview Heights.

And while I'm on a rant, I'll point out that this is a state of few legal U-turns, and many intersections with signs that say, "No turn on red, except curb lane." Both of these things cause traffic tie-ups, the former because it forces drivers to make snap decisions, and the latter because many Ohio drivers are clueless, and read the sign as simply "No turn on red." That's a problem that funding roads can't fix, I suppose. Many Ohioans can't properly yield either, whether at roundabouts (something that I admittedly had problems with at first), or on continuous turn lanes. People in Ohio are also permitted to talk on the phone while driving without the assistance of Bluetooth, which is a huge traffic issue, just from my own observations.

But because of these side-issues about the driving-challenged in Ohio, improved infrastructure is just that much more important. And it's not getting done. I just wonder why. Yes, it's expensive. But it's important. I'd also like to point out that in Las Vegas, we had no city tax, no state tax, and property tax that was about 1/3 the amount in central Ohio. With all of this extra cash at their disposal, where does the tax money go in Ohio? Sure, those orange barrels are out all over the place, so clearly a lot goes to fixing the existing roads after the harsh winter destruction every year.  But here we are in the middle of May, and every excursion out of my house in Reynoldsburg is like a driving obstacle course. So, even that isn't getting done at a very rapid clip.

It's a daily aggravation, for me. I can only assume that your average Ohioan has come to accept the status quo as "just the way things are." When stuck in a traffic jam on East Broad Street out in the relative boonies of Blacklick to Pataskala at 2pm on an odd Saturday, they must just shrug, and think, "it's always been this way." But it doesn't have to be! I've seen it done better! There are many things about my Vegas experience I could bitch about, but attention to infrastructure isn't one of them. Why does Ohio allow this woefully inadequate condition to go on indefinitely?

Travelogue Epilogue: Plane-O-Phobia

Image from VillageHiker

They stagger unsteadily to their feet, like newly born deer. Having heard the soft "bong!" they have stirred from their fitful, zombie-like trances. Though they have been roused, they are clearly not fully alert, nor even cognizant of where they are, or what they should be doing. Slowly--oh, so slowly--a dim awareness begins to flicker, sputtering into a vague knowing. As the others in front of them begin to clear a path, these doughy, slovenly creatures start to move. Not with a purpose, not even with an obvious sense of direction. As though a switch has been flipped, each of them--one at a time--has the realization that they did not come to this place without belongings. They sleepily grope around them, tugging blindly at the items surrounding their berths. It is only when the path before them is utterly clear before they even begin to understand what is going on around them.

Image from Wired.

While the more alert of their brethren watch helplessly from behind them, these lummoxes can be seen finally, finally approaching sentience. Suddenly, they remember: "I have a suitcase in the overhead compartment. I should get that now. Wait, I have to put my sweatshirt on first. And where is my scarf? Oh, here it is, okay, now wait. . ." Like a traffic jam correcting itself in agonizingly slow motion, this process repeats for seemingly every person on the plane in front of me. Like the little old lady who extracts her checkbook--her checkbook!--from her purse only after each of her 147 items has been rung up and bagged at the grocery, I have to quietly tolerate my fellow humans.

I will admit to feeling something akin to claustrophobia in these situations. Or, I assume that's what I'm feeling. My traffic and grocery situations are very, very similar, so I might not have it pegged exactly right. In all of these situations, I'm at the mercy of others, and what I perceive to be stupid humans. I try to control my growing rage, every time I have to experience it. In my trip to and from Ohio this time though, I was in the tail end of each of four planes. Big or small, each deplaning was torturous for me. Many others manage to sit patiently while I stand there and stew. Why, oh why, can I be on my feet with all my belongings, ten seconds after the bell, and no one else can?

What Happens in Vegas: WTF is With These "YIELD ON FLASHING YELLOW ARROW" Lights?

This post is a general observation and complaint about recent changes made in the Las Vegas valley. The traffic lights here used to be generally the same as the ones I grew up with in Ohio, except that most of the lights here are on cantilevered armatures, and in Ohio they were mostly strung on wires (which may have changed in the 18 years I've been gone). But the general concept was the same, red means stop, green means go, green arrow means you can turn and don't have to yield, and yellow means, "hit the gas, the light's turning red!"

The only thing about traffic that has ever confused me is the roundabout, which--I'm convinced--are usually installed as status symbols. They still flummox me, because I've had so little experience with them. But the pattern of traffic lights has always been clear, even with variations, like diagonal arrows, blinking lights, and the occasional red X. But apparently, a solid green in a left turn lane is confusing to people. If you've ever driven you should know that solid green anywhere means "you can go, if it's safe, and you have right-of-way. You yield to oncoming traffic and pedestrians if you're turning left. You yield to pedestrians if you're turning right. Pretty simple.

My animation of the real light that works at Pollock and Pebble.

The American public--not a particularly brilliant lot, the more of them you cram onto a road--must be having a problem with it, because a new trend is sweeping the nation: "Yield on flashing yellow arrow." I only know this, because they started cropping up here in town, and I looked it up. Oddly, though I started noticing them in this past week, I never saw them being installed. Worse, they don't work as advertised.

In exactly one intersection have I witnessed repeated cycles of the light as I suppose they are intended to go: solid green for straight-ahead traffic, solid green arrow for some left turns, and blinking yellow for g'head, turn, just be careful. This was a little unsettling when I noticed it on my daily walk. I was walking in the crosswalk on the walk signal, and the left turn arrow was blinking. It used to be that it would either be a solid red arrow, or a solid green. I'm concerned that the newness of these blinking yellows could cause some pedestrians to get flattened, and we have enough of that in Las Vegas as it is.

Unfortunately, I've encountered several other intersections with the new lights where they do not work as they should. One intersection is near my office, the crossing of Sunset and Valley View. Usually, I get in the southbound left turn lane to cross the freeway on the Sunset bridge. This light used to have a decent length green arrow, followed by an equal length solid green. This would let me get through the light on the first or second cycle. Now, we get a green arrow for the same amount of time, followed by a red arrow. No flashing yellow at all, not ever, even though the sign that mentions it is up there. The turn now takes 2 - 3 cycles, and I've only had to endure it for a week.

Image from the Leader-Telegram.

With the exception of the one intersection where I've seen it work, each time I've encountered this new setup, there has been worse traffic, rather than better. And if I just noticed these things--and there has been no fanfare I'm aware of--I'm sure that they're still unfamiliar to many. I'd like to know what brain-trust thought this up, and if the flashing yellows are on a slow roll-out or something. So far? I hate it.

UPDATE: I finally found an answer to the intersections that aren't working properly. The post is from April of this year, which is around the beginning of the time these lights started going in. I assure you that the ones on my commute are very new, with the Sunset one being for sure new last week. Apparently, they install these lights and a sign, and then turn them on. . .without the yellow flasher activated. Then, they come around later to adjust the timing on that dealie, or whatever. I hope it's soon, or I'm taking a different way home from now on!

Here's Your Sign: Warning! Zombies Ahead!!!

Now this is a helpful warning sign! I mean, I've been a fan of zombie movies for decades, but I didn't know that heading for a colder climate could save you from them. You live, and you learn. . .or you die and you eat brains.

High Gas Prices Lead to Fewer Traffic Deaths?

Photo from Huffington Post

This seems like a rather obvious equation. But it isn't one that occurred to me before reading the article. Less cars on the road, less frequently, maybe not going as fast or having to jockey for position as much. . .sure, makes sense to me.

Here in Las Vegas, I'm already seeing a bit of a difference in traffic. I'm also seeing a lot more people on foot--in 112 degree heat--walking to work. They don't look happy about it, though.

[Excerpt]

Traffic Deaths Drop with Rising Gas Prices

Rising prices at the gas pump appear to be having at least one positive effect: Traffic deaths around the country are plummeting, just as they did during the Arab oil embargo three decades ago.

Researchers with the National Safety Council report a 9 percent drop in motor vehicle deaths overall through May compared with the first five months of 2007, including a drop of 18 percent in March and 14 percent in April. . .

Read more at: Live Science

Thanks to Stupid Monkey Planet for the link.

Las Vegas School of Parking Lot and Road Design

Photos captured from Google Earth (click any for enlargement)

I had a frustrating day of driving and shopping today. I am not a fan of shopping, and traffic takes up 5 of my top 10 pet peeves. The longer I live in Las Vegas, the more convinced I become that there must be a special school for parking lot and road designers in this town.

Let's start with the "big box" shopping center around the corner from my house. If you're a good 'merican, you're combining your shopping trips in order to save gas, right? So you head out to the big box center, a place where you can get (almost) everything done. You pull in to the parking lot, and park down near the Supercuts for a new 'do (well, you do if you're me, and you really just mostly get it all clipped off). Mission accomplished, you decide to head over to the Home Depot for a seasonal major purchase.

You have three choices here. Walk half a mile. Follow the painted lines on the parking lot, and frustrate yourself out of your mind. Or plow through the painted lines to get to your destination, risking T-boning someone else, or having them T-bone you. Upon leaving the Home Depot, you head over to Sam's Club for some boxed wine, and are faced with the same three choices.

Next, you head to the post office. But you must puzzle out your route first, and the route to your next destination. You cannot enter from the east, and you cannot depart to the west. How convenient!

Having ironed out those details, you head out to the dreaded DMV. If there's one place in town that has a well laid-out parking lot (and supporting road structure), it should be the DMV, right? Wrong! You cannot approach from the east, or depart to the west or south! Throw in some narrowly painted lines, some blind alleys and some misleading pedestrian pathways, and you've got a cluster^%$# What is going on here?