Lindsey Graham Collapses on His Fainting Couch, Out of the Race

Oh my gay stars! The 2016 GOP Clown Car is losing a rider, though he was probably always going to be in the rumble seat anyway. Look for Graham to continue going between getting the vapors, and having fits of histeria on the Sunday morning political shows, more than ever.

[Excerpt]

Lindsey Graham suspends his presidential campaign

Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) ended his long-shot presidential bid today, telling supporters in a web video that he succeeded in changing the conversation about how to fight the Islamic state. . .

Read more at: Washington Post

Lindsey Graham is the Drama Queen (Rocky Mountain Mike Song Parody)

With Sen. Lindsey Graham's pre-announcement of his announcement to announce to be a presidential candidate, I thought now was as good a time as any to replay one of my favorite Rocky Mountain Mike parodies.

Sen. Lindsey Graham, Drama Queen (Rocky Mountain Mike Song Parody)
[Originally appeared May 9, 2013]

This may be my new favorite Rocky Mountain Mike (of The Stephanie Miller Show) song parody. For years, people on the left and the right have noticed something a little off about confirmed bachelor Senator Lindsey Graham (R-Fainting Couch). I'd leave well enough alone, were it not for Graham's propensity to be an insufferable media whore, appearing on the Sunday morning political shows almost every week. Worse, he's a talking point regurgitator, to the point of answering direct questions with unrelated, scripted answers. Plus, of course, he's a drama queen. So to me, this song is spot on.

[Editor's Note:] And for any concern trolls out there, yes, I realize that making fun of a person by pointing out that he seems gay can be bad form. I'll even agree that it's in questionable taste. But when said person is running for the absolute top of a political party which has anti-gay planks in its platform--load-bearing planks, mind you--my give-a-shit meter barely registers a shit. Get me? This nearly 60-year-old confirmed bachelor talks like Blanche Devereaux from The Golden Girls, is prone to political histrionics that only need a few hand-flaps and hair-tosses to complete the stereotype. I'm not making fun of his likely homosexuality, I'm making fun of Lindsey Graham himself. The fact that he belongs in a category with Paul Lynde, Charles Nelson Reilly, Liberace and Marcus Bachmann only serves to make it funnier.

2016 Clown Car Update

I've been shirking my duties as a blogger again, sorry about that. I tell you, getting back up on the horse can be tricky once you've gotten off it for an extended period. And plunging into the 2016 election when we're still this far out can feel a little less than urgent. But it's been a while since I updated our Clown Car revue, so I thought I'd add two qualified checkmarks to the tally: Lindsey (oh my gay stars) Graham and Jeb Bush, both of whom have yet to officially declare their candidacy, but both of whom keep dropping "I'm running" quotes. Graham may "well, I de-CLARE!" later today, and if he does, I'll remove my little qualified question mark.

Lindsey Graham's Dick Cheney-Style Sourcing on Benghazi

Southern belle Lindsey Graham has been a Benghazi! shouting machine for a year and a half, determined to make it the next "fetch." So much so, that he's resorted to circular, Dick Cheney-style sourcing when he's gone on the--wait for it--very same Sunday shows the right wing is so obsessed with, regarding Susan Rice. You know how it works. You give a reporter info, she makes it a story, then you relentlessly tout the story as proof of your info! Like magic!
 

Lindsey Graham Called "Ambiguously Gay" by Challenger

Image from source, TPM

First, I'd like to say that I'm not sure that the Senator from South Carolina qualifies as ambiguously gay. But it is irritating that accusing a politician of being gay--whether true or not (it's true)--is still considered a pejorative in 2014. I guess in the South, that kind of allegation makes the challenger a better candidate?

[Excerpt]

Primary Challenger Says South Carolina Is Tired Of 'Ambiguously Gay' Lindsey Graham
 
A primary challenger to Lindsey Graham on Thursday called the Republican senator "ambiguously gay," according to The State. "It's about time that South Carolina (says) hey, we're tired of the ambiguously gay senator from South Carolina," little-known candidate Dave Feliciano said during a press conference at the state house. . .

Read more at: Talking Points Memo

Lindsey Graham: Putin in Ukraine, Because Benghazi!

I'm convinced that Senator Lindsey Graham is being held hostage, maybe by the GOP, maybe by and even more despicable group of people! No, listen, hear my logic. Graham keeps throwing out the word "Benghazi" in increasingly baffling contexts, most recently saying it has something to do with what's happening with Russia and the Ukraine. I think it's code. He's sending us signals, so that the good guys know he needs rescuing! Okay, maybe that's far-fetched. But it makes more sense than what he's telling us.

[Excerpt]

Lindsey Graham Takes This ‘Benghazi’ Thing Just A Bit Too Far For Voice Of Reason Michelle Malkin

Looks like the “Barack Obama’s weakness let Ukraine happen” trope has reached its apotheosis with this tweet from Sen. Lindsey Graham, with its inescapable logic: Barack Obama let Benghazi happen, therefore Ukraine. It’s just like that time when Reagan knew that somebody had to pay for the bombing of the Marine barracks in Beirut, so he invaded Grenada to show Hezbollah who’s boss. If Obama had just kicked somebody’s ass — anybody’s — we would surely not have seen Russia trying to reclaim parts of the old Soviet territories. Remember how George W. Bush’s swift vengeance for 9/11 completely dissuaded Vladimir Putin from invading Georgia in 2008? . . .

Read more at: Wonkette

Daily Show: Jon Stewart's Take on Lindsey Graham

Oh, my stars! I may just get the vapors!

 

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
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Weekend Update: So, What's Going On?

So, we're in the back half of a long weekend now, and I would seemingly have all kinds of time to blog. And yet, I've not put a darn thing on the blog since Friday! Why not? Several reasons. 1) There was no Real Time with Bill Maher this weekend, which took away one of my regular posts. 2) Saturday Night Live is now in reruns, so no clips from that. 3) My DVR screwed up and copied two simultaneous episodes of FOX "News" Sunday of all things, and no other Sunday politics shows. So after watching that--and only that--I'm actually dumber than I was going in.

F"N"S is still desperately trying to hang scandals around the President's neck, and other than a droning Bob Dole interview, that's really all there was to it. Of course, everyone's favorite Southern belle, Lindsey Graham was there. My goodness, and I declare, how could he ever have time to get hisself to church when he's always working on the sabbath? Mercy!

Anyway, that's why I haven't posted much today. I still intend to get a Blast from the Past up today, and if there is any interesting news, I'll get up some more posts. Otherwise, I just intend to enjoy my time off, and also do a little spit of work I have to do on my part-time job. Everyone, try to get your nose out of the screens you're looking at too much (like me) and enjoy the out of doors!

Gays Punted from Immigration Reform

Now see, the guy on the left you can call anything you want. Mary. Miss
Scarlett. But the guys on the right? I'm disappointed, but I don't think
they're homophobes. Image from DailyKos.

I'm not sure where I come down on this one. What it boils down to is, leading Democrats fought for Senator Patrick Leahy's amendment that would allow legally married gay couples to petition for their spouses to get legal status, if they are foreign born. Republicans balked, and will kill the immigration reform bill if it doesn't include discrimination. Ain't that sweet? And the Democrats--as they are wont to do have pulled the amendment. This includes some pretty staunch liberals, including Charles Schumer and Al Franken (a personal fave).

Some gay activists--as they are wont to do--are going full-bore against those Democrats, and presumably the President. So, one of my favorite bloggers--John Aravosis of AmericaBlog.com--has the Senators emblazoned with "HOMOPHOBE" in red letters. Yikes. Me, I'm not quite so reactionary. And I don't believe Leahy and especially Franken in particular are homophobes. I think they're pragmatists, and they really want this legislation to pass. The Republicans are holding it hostage, because they insist upon enshrining their bigotry into law. To me, it is the Republicans who are the villains in this, the question is whether the hostage negotiators did a bad job.

And I get it, I do. It sucks, but I do. The Supreme Court's decision in June could render the question moot, if we get federal recognition for legally married couples. If that happens, I've gotta think it would be at most some changes to verbiage. This situation is ultimately a reminder that gays are still not completely equal in this country. We're still treated as though we're criminals or some alien "other." I mean, can you imagine if this fight was over married interfaith couples? Married mixed race couples? But even I will concede that though we've made amazing progress in civil rights, we have a ways to go. And we have a whole generation that might need to shuffle off before we get there. Unfortunately, I'm right behind them!

[Excerpt]

Immigration Reform Amendment For Gay Couples Withdrawn

Sens. Dick Durbin (D-Ill.) and Chuck Schumer (D-N.Y.) had to make what the New York senator called an "excruciating" decision on Tuesday to come out against including LGBT couple provisions in their immigration reform bill, citing the need to keep the fragile balance in the "gang of eight."
Sounding disappointed, Senate Judiciary Chairman Patrick Leahy (D-Vt.) withdrew the amendment after debate during a markup on the bill. . .

Read more at: Huffington Post

Sen. Lindsey Graham, Drama Queen (Rocky Mountain Mike Song Parody)

This may be my new favorite Rocky Mountain Mike (of The Stephanie Miller Show) song parody. For years, people on the left an d the right have noticed something a little off about confirmed bachelor Senator Lindsey Graham (R-Fainting Couch). I'd leave well enough alone, were it not for Graham's propensity to be an insufferable media whore, appearing on the Sunday morning political shows almost every week. Worse, he's a talking point regurgitator, to the point of answering direct questions with unrelated, scripted answers. Plus, of course, he's a drama queen. So to me, this song is spot on.

Why are Lindsey Graham and John McCain on EVERY SUNDAY?

I watched--as I often do--a couple of the Sunday shows this weekend. My usual picks are Meet the Press with David Gregory and FOX "News" Sunday with Chris Wallace. Not because I like them, or think they're the best (heavens, no), probably mostly out of habit. FNS I only watch to see what they're up to, but MTP is just as likely to be from a rightward cant on any given Sunday. It has been shown through several studies that no matter which party is in control of the White House or either house of Congress, the Sunday shows tip rightward in their choice of guests.

It's no wonder, when you consider which of these guys apparently live to be on TV. Lindsey Graham and John McCain--seemingly closer than some married couples--will show up on any of these shows on any given week. Sometimes on multiple shows on the same day. It doesn't matter what the topic is, it doesn't matter if they've been absolutely wrong on many previous occasions. It doesn't matter that either is likely to sputter "BENGHAZI!!!" an any moment, regardless of what question they were asked. There they are, the failed presidential candidate who picked a moron running mate, and the fading Southern belle gentleman, every damned week.

I miss Tim Russert as infuriating as he himself could be. I even miss Tony Snow, who could snark without the vaguely creepy vibe Wallace always exudes. I'd appreciate it if Gregory, Wallace, Bob Schieffer and the rest would stop booking lobbyists and hate group leaders for their point/counterpoints. I'd like to see Karl Rove frog-marched out of one of the studios, and Peggy Noonan laughed off the stage for her loopy delivery. But mostly, I want to stop seeing McCain and his little buddy every single week.

John McCain Doesn't Understand Own Conspiracy Theory

This blog post from Rachel Maddow's MaddowBlog asks the same question I've been asking about the Benghazi attack on September 11 of last year. That being, what is being covered up? If you listen any day, almost any time, on FOX "News," you'll hear that there is a Benghazi coverup. Oddly, right-wing world is very, very concerned about what Susan Rice had to say five days later on the Sunday political shows. Why they're focused like a laser on that day, that spokesperson, those facts is something of a mystery, but to them, that is the crux of everything. [Story continues below]

Visit NBCNews.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

To me, it's especially odd that it's Lindsey Graham and John McCain squawking about it the most--unironically--on those same Sunday shows. It would be an easy project to comb through the records of Meet the Press, Face the Nation and FOX "News" Sunday to find misstatements and outright falsehoods from both McCain and Graham on topics smaller and larger than Benghazi.  And yet there is John McCain, still going on about a conspiracy theory, a cover up. But the oddest part is that McCain cannot articulate what the cover up even was. When pressed, he sputters about the four dead Americans. Nobody is happy about four dead Americans, and to allege that you can't be both sad and disinterested in conspiracy theories about Benghazi is just stupid.

[Excerpt]

McCain lost in a fog of partisan rage

Looking back at the tragic and deadly attack on the U.S. consulate in Benghazi last fall, we know quite a bit about what happened. We also know, thanks to an independent investigation, that "Republican charges of a cover-up" were "pure fiction."

But as Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) argued yesterday, he can't be bothered with facts -- he has a partisan vendetta to pursue. . .

Read more at: MaddowBlog

Attention Lindsey Graham: Social Security Has Nothing to do With "Fiscal Cliff!"

Close your mouth, Lindsey. People are starting to talk.

I know that Republicans really, really, really want to undo FDR's "New Deal" and all, but it gets tiresome when they try to attach "Social Security reform" to manufactured crises like the "fiscal cliff" or raising the "debt ceiling." Social Security is its own separate, self-funded thing. It has nothing to do with what's going on right now. Lindsey Graham and the rest of the GOP are being disingenuous and reckless with the United States economy.

[Excerpt]

GOP Senator Lindsey Graham Takes Nation Hostage – Raise Social Security Retirement Age Or Else

As reported on Think Progress, Republican Senator Lindsey Graham, who represents South Carolina, would throw the country into an economic calamity that is expected to make 2008’s Great Recession look like a New Year’s Eve party if Republicans don’t get the spending cuts to entitlements they’re so desperately craving. . .

Read more at: Addicting Info

Irony Alert: Lindsey Graham Thinks Obama Should "Man Up"

Image from source, Think Progress

Lindsey, girlfriend, you really shouldn't make this so easy.

[Excerpt]

Lindsey Graham: Debt Ceiling Will Force Obama To Man Up On Medicare Cuts

On Monday, Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC) conceded that Congress will find new revenues to avert the tax increases that are part of the so-called fiscal cliff in January, but predicted that Republicans won’t raise the nation’s debt ceiling unless President Obama agrees to fundamentally reform Medicare and Social Security. . .

Read more at: Think Progress

Reality Chasm Between GOP Rhetoric and Actions

The GOP alternate reality machine usually chugs along, on message between its official mouthpieces, the elected officials, and what "some say" on FOX "News." Lately, they way the GOP has been depicting itself to the beltway press has differed greatly from what they're actually doing though.

Visit NBCNews.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Shameless Gossip: Is Senator Lindsey Graham Gay?

Shameless Gossip is a Greenlee Gazette feature that departs from the usual straight-ahead news and commentary. Stories under this banner should be read with a great deal of skepticism. But you never know, they could turn out to be true. . .

Not that I care much one way or the other, mind you. But it would be even less surprising than Ricky Martin's, Sean Hayes' or Clay Aiken's revelations.


[Excerpt]

Lindsey Graham Gay? Conservative Group ALIPAC Demands Senator 'Admit Homosexuality'



William Gheen, head of the conservative, anti-"amnesty," anti-illegal immigration group Americans for Legal Immigration PAC (ALIPAC), spoke at a Greenville, S.C. Tea Party rally this weekend and called for Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) to "come out of that log cabin closet. . ."

Read more at: Huffington Post

Sunday Morning Blogging, Pt. 1: Meet the Press, 9/20/09

OK, I haven't sat down to watch the Sunday morning political chat shows in a little while. There's a reason for that: they were starting to piss me off. Bouncing around from the political faux outrage of the previous Monday to the forced apology of late Saturday, the shows have largely become Politics Soup, only with actual elected officials. Then, most of the shows get together a bizarre collection of--usually, also bizarre looking--talking heads to cackle like chickens for the rest of the show.

What? You mean they've always been like that? Oh. Well, maybe it's just ceasing to interest me. Anyway, my first dose of this soup today is Meet the Press with David Gregory, a decidedly less relevant show since host Tim Russert died. President Obama was the first guest, and I was fairly impressed, though he only talked for 15 minutes. He's a little too slick, but he's also well spoken, and did not raise my embarrassment shield the way George W. Bush did every damned time he was on the tee-vee.

Gregory decided to rebut the President with two of the most powerful current Republicans, and that is a sad state of affairs for the GOP. Twitchy, orange John Boner Boehner and whiny, frowny, fey Lindsey Graham are two of the three best the GOP has to offer (the third being constipated turtle, Mitch McConnell who did not appear). These easily lampooned figures did their best to talk down Obama while trying to put an eensy bit of distance between themselves and the lunatic fringe overtaking their party like Invasion of the Body Snatchers. The charisma-free twosome regurgitated the conservative lines of the week, including a "reset button" for health care reform, which isn't even under consideration. Probably no one was swayed by Obama, and definitely no one was swayed by Boehner and Graham.

The two-man "round table" included Eugene Robinson, a pundit I have a lot of respect for, and Roger Simon, a pundit I've never heard of. Robinson displays more intelligence, insight and humor than the host himself, and Simon left no impression on me at all. Discussions of "race" brought up because of Jimmy Carter's notion of racism inspiring Obama's opposition, didn't go beyond the controversy. That is where Gregory falls down, and Russert would have done better. There is a strong case to be made for racism behind the birthers, deathers, tenthers, tea baggers et. al. And Jimmy Carter saying so isn't itself the controversy. Calling out racist behavior has become the issue, rather than the behavior itself.

There is still something rather civilized about MTP that works on one hand, and doesn't on the other. For the most part, the program doesn't lend itself to boisterous arguments and cross-talk. That is welcome on a Sunday morning. But it also lends itself to a he said/he said dynamic, in which no minds are changed. OK, that's it for MTP. . . on to the next one.

Sunday Blogging Blues

Image from Despair.com

What do you do when you're a current events/political blogger, and nothing going on at the moment inspires you to write? Well, that is my current prediciment, though it is tempered by the fact that I've already declared myself on semi-blogging-vacation.

But today, I've been trying to catch up with the Sunday morning political shows, and I am not engaged. One quick way to get me to zone out is to put David Axelrod on the screen, dancing around questions for 15 minutes. Another way? Stick Sen. Lindsey Graham and Willard "Mitt" Romney next to each other, doing the same thing. Blecccch.

Part of the problem is the talk on health care. The problem isn't cost. It isn't big business vs. government control. It is that Democrats are apparently incable of using language effectively in their political battles. "Public option" and "single payer" are phrases that on their face mean nothing to me. The Republicans aren't always more clear, but a phrases like "socialized medicine" and "job killer" are certainly more visceral.

Where in the world is the Democratic Frank Luntz? I'm not suggesting that we find a slimy weasel like Luntz, just a person with a little marketing savvy, a little creativity. I'm actually sort of surprised that President Obama isn't better at it. Are David Axelrod and Robert Gibbs really the best that he could do? Oh, and by the way, "cap and trade" is also ridiculous and meaningless. It's very easy to demonize something that nobody understands.

Iraq, Sucess or Succeeding? The Surge, Worked or Working?

Image from MSNBC

The whole subject of Iraq is confusing to me. Is it still a war that we need to win? Did we already win, and now we're keeping the peace? Are we peacekeepers or occupiers? And then there's the surge. Is the surge working? Has the surge already worked? Or is the surge over with? I'm not the only one confused, as evidenced by John McCain's own statements.

In a USA Today article on June 17th, McCain is quoted as saying, "The situation on the ground is that we have made enormous success and the surge has worked." But the phrase is alternated with claims that "The surge is working," by McCain, Bush and others.

CNN reported that on Sept. 5, McCain's--ahem--buddy, Sen. Lindsey Graham said, "America is safer because we're winning in Iraq." But I've also heard that we've won in Iraq. Either way, what winning is, is never defined. Even what losing is, is never defined. McCain says if Barack Obama had his way, we would have already pulled out, and that would have been in defeat.

But what is defeat? Getting out without more US service members dying? What is victory? Sticking around, but nobody's dying? Before we ever went in, no US service members were dying in Iraq. Would we have won if we'd never gone?

Not surprisingly, whenever a Republican is asked point blank what "victory" or "winning" is, they duck the question. Nobody, it would seem, has any idea. What we do know, is that Iraq is not a liberated, free wonderful little democratic society. Bad stuff is still happening there. So did the surge work? I have no idea.

[Excerpt]

Monday: 26 Iraqis Killed, 52 Wounded

A significant number of attacks occurred across Iraq today. Almost all of them caused very few casualties though, keeping the figures deceptively low. At least 26 Iraqis were killed and 52 more were wounded. . .

Read more at: Antiwar.com

[Excerpt]

U.S. soldiers kill physician in Diala by mistake – police

A physician was accidentally killed by U.S. forces in central Baaquba district on Monday, a police source in Diala said. . .

Read more at: Aswataliraq

Links courtesy of Stupid Monnkey Planet

Latest Meme: Barack Obama Playing Race Card?

Ah, me. I'm in the middle of watching the tedious Sunday morning political shows. Meet the Press was a difficult way to wake myself up today. In fact, I woke up a little late, so joined the program a few minutes in. On the panel (currently hosted by Tom Brokaw), were two Democratic losers. Literally. One was Senator John Kerry, nominee for President in 2004; the other was Senator Joe Lieberman, nominee for Vice President in 2000. Snooooooze!

You'd expect more camaraderie between the two Democrats, but no. Lieberman seems to be completing his transition from D to R, and is speaking (in his Willie Tanner on ALF voice) at the Republican National Convention. The round table segment was a snooze as well, with Chuck Todd the only guy with anything of interest to say.

FOX "News" Sunday was its typical self, with some usual suspects. Senator Lindsey Graham continued his histrionics, his bad note-reading skills, and still looks like a constipated, sexually frustrated turtle.* Opposite him was Former Senator Tom Daschle, who is far too "inside the beltway" to adequately argue for Barack Obama. Graham, fulfilling a blog prophesy from earlier in the week played the race card, by saying that Barack Obama played the race card. Sneaky! Frustrated Lindsey read (with disgust in his voice) Obama's jokey "doesn't look like other Presidents" and "by the way, he's black" comments with disgust dripping from his voice. He really is quite the drama queen thespian.

The "by the way, he's black" comment that Obama said in a joking manner, is probably an allusion to a racially themed public service announcement often heard on the radio. The ad I'm talking about--if I'm remembering the right one--has a man going through resumes, looking to hire someone. He tosses out each one with a discriminatory remark, one of which is something like, "by the way, he's black." It's a sound clip often played and parodied on The Stephanie Miller Show. And it is not out of place. I absolutely guarantee that the 527s, if not John McCain's campaign, will be playing the race card, sublty and overtly, many times between now an November. Mark my words.

Face the Nation was on, but I lost interest. And This Week was delayed here by sports. It's just as well. After the first two, I was so over it. And you probably are too, so goodbye for now!

*One last thing. Sorry for my potentially childish assessment of Graham, but in truth it is a gentle substitute for what I wanted to write. Graham has an air about him that gives me a wiggins, and having Chris Wallace at the same desk makes that worse. I can't put my finger on why, but they give me the creeps. 'Nuff Said.