The Fat Thing Revisited for the Last Time. . .Again.



This is a re-working of a post I wrote a couple of years ago, on my last cycle of dieting. In the time since, I maintained the weight loss for a good long time, at least nine months. Weight gain crept up a little after that, but not much. Since I'd gotten well below the "overweight" line, I really did have some wiggle-room built in.

Though I got interrupted a few times, I pretty much kept to Atkins, and continued to exercise several times a week.  A year after losing over 30 pounds, I was still down over 20. Not great, but not fat. Over the next eight months or so, I wandered up another five, and that put me right at the edge of normal/overweight. From September of last year to now, I've had a series of de-railing events from the flu, to Thanksgiving, to a stomach ailment, to vacations to Oregon and Iowa, and of course Christmas and New Year's. Well, that did it. After more than two years, I'm right back at square one. And that means 180-182ish (my scale is kind of flaky). And since I'm back at square one, here's that original post, which was written in May of 2011, a false-start of sorts. Though it began a period of very regular exercise, I didn't couple it with a diet, and so my real weight loss didn't begin until September of that year. From May, 2011, with updates:

In a fair and just world, this would be my "before" and "after"
pictures. Though I think I do look better than Ryan
Reynolds in a fat suit. Not saying I do, I just think I do.

Have you ever met someone who is so good looking, they're almost intimidating? I'm not talking about sexual attraction (though I wouldn't rule it out), I just mean that they're so attractive, it's inescapable. There was a client who comes into our office from time to time who meets that description. He's dark haired, blue eyed, and has an intense gaze. He has the look of a superhero, like Superman or Captain Marvel. He's got this reputation of a real womanizer, and I'm really not surprised about that. The first couple of times I saw him, in addition to taking all that in, I did notice that he was carrying 15-20 pounds around the middle that he could stand to lose. But the way he looked, he really pulled it off.

The next few times I saw him, I thought he probably should lay off the pizza and beer, because his 15-20 pounds had grown up to a good 30 or so. And the last time I saw him, he was pushing 45-50 more than he should. Only now, he's been carrying extra weight long enough, his hands and face are getting plump, along with the belly. Suddenly, he's not so intimidating anymore. Now, he's just starting to look like the rest of us! And I'm beginning to realize that if I could stand to lose 30 pounds, my estimates of him and others just might be low-balled quite a bit.

At the age of 47, I find that without a great deal of effort, I quickly and easily go down the same road. I've gotten an unfortunate blend of genes from my family: skinny genes and weight gain genes. If that seems like a contradiction, it's really not. I grew up a bean pole, literally able to eat as much and as often as I wanted, and never gained an an ounce. As I've segued from decade to decade, the metabolism has slowed down, and my "idle" weight has increased incrementally. I'm still a beanpole, with skinny arms, skinny legs, small chest and shoulders. But I've got the beans now too, with fat collecting around the stomach, butt and face. If I'm not dieting and exercising regularly, I get fat in those areas, and quickly.

At 20, my idle weight was 140. At 30, it was up to 150. At 40, It could be from 160-170, and now at 47? 180-and up. Seriously. I don't have to eat a lot, I just have to eat normally and not exercise, and boom, tubbo. And like the good looking guy I mentioned, if I stay fat long enough, my hands get fat enough to change ring sizes, and my face--where the weight goes first, and leaves last--gets rounder, and rounder. My friends and family (except for my brutally honest mother) always say, "you're not fat," or "you don't need to diet." But I know better.
Probably not for the last time (but who really knows), I'm hitting the Atkins Diet and the exercise again. Last time, I'd tipped the scales at about 185 (I didn't really want to know), with only a couple of pairs of pants fitting. For a guy who wore a 28" waist in college, growing out of 34"s is just embarrassing. So, I'm back to the gym, and/or walking 4 miles, and as in the past, I'll be doing that 5-7 days per week. I'm back on the low-carb diet, being careful to stay in the 20-grams-of-carbs range, and also trying not to do the low-carb treats, or overdo portion sizes. I've got a ways to go, but I'm already down a few pounds, and I just really started again on Thursday. It comes off a lot more slowly than it goes on, as everyone knows.  I doubt I'll ever get down to 140 pounds again without a horrifying disease, but I will get down to less than clinically overweight, which for me is about 165. And though I'll never be so good looking that I'm intimidating, I'm kind of doubting that the guy in my example will again, either!

Here's hoping that it works as it has in the past, and that I can increase the time I keep it off, so that I don't have to start over again for quite some time. If you are starting a similar plan, I'm pulling for you! I'll publish updates, and will be republishing a bunch of Atkins recipes in the next few weeks, along with any new ones I discover or invent. Here's to the un-fattening!

Atkins Diet/Low Carb Recipe: Cajun Faux Rice

Click to embiggen.

If you are on a low-carb diet, you know that you get carb cravings. Specific ones too, like not just rice, but fried rice. Well, if you haven't tried using cauliflower as a rice substitute yet, get cracking! Here are two recipes I've posted in the past, one for beef fried rice, and one for curry rice.

The last time I did the curry dish, I got it in my head that the next time I do this, I'm going to figure out how to do a Cajun rice dish out of cauliflower, something like red beans & rice (without the beans). How hard could it be? Well, depending upon your aptitude and desire to really cook, it's not too bad. It's not fast, and it's a bit messy. But it is really, really good! This is my first try, very loosly based upon a couple of different recipes I found online for different Cajun rice recipes, and my own intuition.

One medium-large head of cauliflower
One medium onion
One red bell pepper
One green bell pepper
Two tablespoons diced garlic (I used prepared from a jar)
Liberal splash of olive oil
One pound of low-carb sausage, browned ground beef, or other meat*
Two Bay Leaves
1/2 tp Cayenne Pepper, 1 tp Thyme, 1/4 tp Sage, 1 tp Cajun Seasoning
1/2-can Chicken Broth

Chop the onion, bell pepper and garlic (if it is not prepared), as well as the meat you are using (*Casual Gourmet Chicken Sausage pre-cooked Roasted Red Pepper & Spinach is what I used). In a large skillet, sauté meat, onion, bell peppers and garlic, med-high heat, duration: 15 minutes more or less. (I sprinkled some chili powder & cajun seasoning over entire mixture before sautéing, on a whim).

While the skillet is going, prepare your cauliflower. Make it rice-like in your preferred way (this is the messy part), whether that is chopping, a food processor, or a cheese grater.

Add spices and bay leaves to the skillet. Add 1/2-can Chicken Broth (otherwise, it's a bit dry). Pour "rice" into skillet, stir, cover, keep heat med-high. Duration: About 20-25 minutes, let your intuition be your guide. Stir occasionally, to make sure all the spices and ingredients get thoroughly mixed, and that the "rice" gets evenly cooked. If it's too soupy to your taste, uncover and simmer for a while.

Carb Count: Sausage: 5 g (1 per link), Cauliflower: 20ish, entire batch, Peppers: 8ish for both, Onion: 6ish. Entire skillet-full of food: 29 grams. Serves at least 8 servings, so a generous serving size is about 4 g of carbohydrates, max! 

In a word: it's delicious. The consistency of the rice won't fool anyone, and I wonder if the cauliflower should be cooked "dry" and added to the rest later in the process. In my previous "rice" dishes, there was no broth, but this dish seems to require it. But what this dish does, is satisfy a craving. There is virtually no trade-off, you don't feel deprived at all that it isn't the real thing. And you don't have to like cauliflower, either, you'd never know that's what it's made of unless you were told.

A Low-Carb Diet Success Story (and Survival Guide)

This week will mark 6 months of successful maintenance on my own modified version of the Atkins diet. I call this a success story because I intend to prolong that six months, and have already met the challenge of encroaching weight. Let me explain.

Don't let this happen to you!

This was (at least) my sixth go-around of low-carb dieting. Of those six, only four--counting this time--were successful. But the mere fact that I'm on it again is a testament to the curse of most any diet: falling off the wagon. The weight returns faster than it comes off, as almost everybody knows. And after you hit a certain weight in the wrong direction, our response is often, "Oh, what difference does it make now?" That kind of attitude can cause an even bigger problem, pun intended. It seems that each time we fall off a diet, our "ceiling weight" goes up. I found after my last backslide that I couldn't even exercise the weight off without also dieting. My 5' 8+" body was finally pushing the scales past 180 lbs. And with my endomorphic frame, that just didn't work. If I stay at that weight long enough, it spreads around to my face, my legs, even my fingers.

School cafeteria Ranch Burgers
made on low-carb bread.

It's not a good look for me. So, last September 6, I decided I was going low-carb again, and this time I approached it with the same fervency that I gave quitting smoking: no excuses. I kept my carbohydrate intake at no more than 20-25 carbs at all times. By late October, I had shed 25 pounds. And by Thanksgiving--11 weeks after I started--I was down to 150, which is at least 30 pounds, possibly a little past that. Since then, I haven't ever gotten heavier than 154 (briefly), or lower than 147. My high school weight of 140 does seem out of reach, so I've given away all of my sub-32" waisted pants, and all of the over-33" ones!

Cheesy Faux Potato Bake.
We're almost never without it.

I've instituted and rule, a rule that is certainly not as challenging as "no more cigarettes." That rule is, if the scale even approaches 155 (a weight which I thought was "heavy" when I was in my 20s), I step up the diet and exercise. An addendum to the rule is that if I've maintained 150 or lower for a couple of weeks, I can have a cheat day. More on that in a minute. And so far, it has worked. Barring a catastrophic event in my life or my family, I intend to keep these rules. My goals are now at monthly intervals. I'm shooting for a year. And I'll take it six months at a time like that until this is just life for me. After all of these tries at the diet, I feel like I'm finally in a pattern that works. So, here are some of the things that have helped me keep the weight off, if you're trying the diet too.

• Start the diet by ridding your house of snack foods, and most any tempting high carbohydrate product.
• Be on the lookout for carbs/sugars in things that don't seem like they'd have much (they put high-fructose corn syrup in everything these days, even some "diet" items).
• Be wary of "serving sizes" of even low-carb foods. Sometimes a tiny package will claim it has seven servings.
• Remember that you can subtract fiber grams from carb grams to get your "net carb" number. If the food has a lot of fiber, it will cancel out and equal number of carb grams.

Cauliflower Faux Fried Rice &
Stir Fry. Amazingly good.

• Stock up on diet friendly items that can relieve any suffering you might be having on this restrictive diet, such as:

• Pepperoni slices (which you can microwave on paper towels, if you're scared of all that fat)
• Cheese in cubes, slices, bricks. There are some carbs in some cheeses, but most are very low.
• Eggs. Buy the 60-egg flat at Sam's or Costco. Eggs are a wonderful meal any time in many varities, and can be used in egg salad, chicken salad, tuna salad, and on and on. Bacon is also good in all of those salads!
• Dill pickles, in full, spears, hamburger slices or gherkins.
• Cauliflower, radishes, turnips, lettuce, green onion, green beans, broccoli. Turnips and cauliflower can often be used as a substitute for potatoes, in roasts and bakes.
• Butter, for recipes.
• Bacon, cook your own, pre-cooked and/or crumbled (for countless recipes).
• Hamburger patties.
• Hot dogs, bratwurst, sausages (just check carb counts first).
• Meat, from roasts, to pork loin, to London broil, to steaks. Prepare a lot on the weekend, and package lunches or freeze portions for later.
• Seafood, if you dig it (I don't).
• Flax meal, if you're a baker. There are countless recipes for breads, muffins, pizza dough etc. online.
• Powdered diet drink mixes (check the label).
• Atkins diet bars and drinks (but more about sugar alcohols below).
• Mission brand low-carb white tortillas (all other low-carb tortillas I've tried tasted awful. These are good!).
• Chicken wings. Read nutritional info to be sure of the carbs. I love Tyson tequila lime, and I sprinkle some Cajun seasoning on them, and cook them longer so they're crispy.
• Kroger brand (also Ralphs, Smith's, etc.) Carb Masters yogurt. 4 carbs each, and delicious! 
• Beef jerky, but check the ingredients. Jack Links Original has only 3 cars each.
• Ingredients for homemade soups. You can make chicken or hamburger soups that are delicious and low-carb, and use egg drop for noodles! See here.

Pizza on a flaxseed crust. Tastier the
second day. Personal pizzas on
Mission low carb tortillas are better.

There are a few items that only certain people on a low-carb diet can eat and drink without disrupting their diets. I'm one of the lucky ones who can have everything in this list (don't hate me because my digestive system is efficient!). So if you have any of these things, add them a little ways into your diet, and see if they make you stop losing, or actually gaining:

• Nuts, particularly peanuts and almonds. My favorites are dry roasted peanuts, and smoked almonds.
• Alcohol, like vodka, whiskey. Red wine doesn't seem to hurt my diet either. Low-carb beers in moderation are also okay. Probably should avoid all alcohol in the first two weeks. Watch out for sweet liquors or flavored rums too.
• Caffeine. Dr. Atkins said no, I said, "Screw you, Dr. Atkins, you're dead!" And I've had no issue.
• Diet soda. Many people are concerned about artificial sweeteners, their affect on the body, on hunger levels, and whether they are safe. I figure I've been drinking them since the 80s. If they're gonna kill me, they're gonna kill me. And can they really be worse than high-fructose corn syrup? I drink it like a fish, and I still lost 30 pounds.
• Diet ice creams and other treats (like Atkins bars and drinks). In these items, you start with the carbohydrate grams, subtract fiber grams, and also subtract sugar alcohol grams. This is sort of controversial, and apparently doesn't work for everybody. But it works for me, yay!

Flaxseed focaccia cheesy bread.
Not outstanding, but pretty good.

My saving grace this go-around has been the internet. Since the low-carb diet craze faded, and people moved to other things, there are fewer companies making low-carb items. So getting some recipes was essential. In addition to recipes I've invented myself, I've got quite a variety of things I can eat without getting bored. I have highlighted several of those recipes on this blog in the past, and if you go to this post, it will link to others, which will link to others. . . My favorites are the Faux Cheesy Potato Bake, the Cauliflower faux fried rice, and the Low-carb Pizza (both on Mission tortillas and on Flax crust). And if you don't find what you're looking for within those links, or the ones below this post, you can type, "low carb," "Atkins" or "cauliflower" into the search box at the upper left of this page for more targeted searching. Feel free to write me for advice or questions!

Now, about the cheat days. There are two types. The first is a scheduled "anything goes" day. This is particularly good for big holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas, or littler ones like birthdays and summer cookouts. If you've been really good for a while, hit a personal goal, etc., go ahead and splurge. Even turn it into a weekend if you want. Then go back on the diet and exercise full-bore following your scheduled "time out." The worst damage you're going to do is a couple of pounds, and the cheat--for me anyway--often seems to jump-start the diet. The second type of cheat is to use carb blockers, like Carb Intercept, which is available at Wal-mart and other stores, or can be bought cheaper online. Now, I have no idea about the science behind this product, but it allegedly prevents the absorption of carbohydrates by the body. I don't even care if it's a placebo (don't tell me!), because it seems to work. I take these on days where it is difficult to avoid carbs (popcorn at the movies, special events), when I'm not looking to jump start, not looking to go nuts. I still try to limit these events. But "cheat days" overall can save your sanity. Let's be honest, can you give up potatoes, rice, bread, cake and cookies for the entirety of the rest of your life?

PS. I should note that The Other Half--who had gained quite a bit of weight over the past 10 years decided to join me on the diet this time around, after saying "it doesn't work for him." This time, he stuck to it, and it did work. He's lost over 50 pounds! And he started in October.

UPDATE: I forgot to mention that I exercise 5-7 days per week, most weeks. And by exercise, I usually walk 4 miles, or about 45 minutes on the treadmill. If I do it at the gym, I follow with a little swimming. I really ought to do more at the gym, but suiting up to just go walking is so much easier and less time intensive!

Another Low Carb Pizza, Plus Focaccia!

My latest pizza with golden flaxseed.  Oh, and
I put sesame seeds around the edge. Click to embiggen.

Today, while out shopping, I decided to buy a bag of golden flaxseed meal, from Bob's Red Mill.  I've used a lot of flaxseed meal since I started my most recent go-around with the Atkins Diet, but never the golden. Flax as a baking material is borderline passable.  You can make muffins that are adequate and breads that are functional. Notice, I didn't say delicious. Flax has a strong, but not unpleasant taste, so flavorings like garlic or chocolate have difficulty breaking through. When I've made pumpkin muffins, for instance, I've had to double the amount of spices I might put in a pumpkin pie. And they still taste of flax.

All of that said, I've come to enjoy products made with flax. Like I said, they're not unpleasant, they're just not delicious. So I decided to try the golden flax meal this time, to see if the flavor is better. You know what? It is. It's better. It's still flax, but it's better. So, if you try the recipe below, keep in mind that golden flax looks more like real pizza crust, and tastes a little milder than brown flax. I should note: this pizza does taste better as a leftover, I've found, than it does on the first day. I don't know why.

Re-reading this, I think I've heaped a little too much warning onto this recipe, as though you'll barely be able to stomach this pizza. Not true! It's actually quite good, especially if you're stuck in Atkins, and desperately want some pizza! The crust will not fool you, but neither will it terrify you!

LOW CARB FLAXSEED CRUST PIZZA

Brown Flax Crust. Click to embiggen.

Ingredients:

• 1 and 1/2 C flax seed meal
• 2 teaspoons baking powder
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1 teaspoon oregano
• Sweetener to equal about 1 Tablespoon of sugar
• 3 Tablespoons of oil
• 3 eggs
• 1/2 C water

Preparation:

Preheat oven to 425 F.

1. Mix dry ingredients together.
2. Add wet ingredients, and mix very well.
3. Let sit for about 5 minutes to thicken.
4. Spread on pan (I put it on a silicon mat or greased parchment paper).
5. Bake for 15-18 minutes until cooked through, then add toppings* and cook until they are done.

Nutritional Analysis: Whole crust has 7 grams of effective carbohydrate, plus 52 grams fiber, 47 grams protein, 130 grams healthy fat, and 1525 calories.

SOURCE: About.com

*My toppings included Kroger pizza sauce (not too much, just enough to spread around), pepperoni (two layers!), plenty of shredded mozzarella, a little shredded sharp cheddar, some shredded ham, crumbled bacon and more pepperoncini slices. My cook time after adding the toppings was about 15 minutes, with the convection on.

LOW CARB FLAXSEED FOCACCIA BREAD

Ingredients:

My focaccia, sliced & plated.  Also using the golden flax.
Click to embiggen.

• 2 cups flax seed meal
• 1 Tablespoon baking powder
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1-2 Tablespoons sugar equivalent from artificial sweetener
• 5 beaten eggs
• 1/2 cup water
• 1/3 cup oil

Preparation:

Preheat oven to 350 F. Prepare pan (a 10X15 pan with sides works best) with oiled parchment paper or a silicone mat.

1) Mix dry ingredients well -- a whisk works well.

2) Add wet to dry, and combine well. Make sure there aren't obvious strings of egg white hanging out in the batter.

3) Let batter set for 2 to 3 minutes to thicken up some (leave it too long and it gets past the point where it's easy to spread.)

4) Pour batter onto pan. Because it's going to tend to mound in the middle, you'll get a more even thickness if you spread it away from the center somewhat, in roughly a rectangle an inch or two from the sides of the pan (you can go all the way to the edge, but it will be thinner).

5) Bake for about 20 minutes, until it springs back when you touch the top and/or is visibly browning even more than flax already is.

6) Cool and cut into whatever size slices you want. You don't need a sharp knife; I usually just cut it with a spatula.

Nutritional Information: Each of 12 servings has less than a gram of effective carbohydrate (.7 grams to be exact) plus 5 grams fiber, 6 grams protein, and 185 calories.

SOURCE: About.com

Note: I put some sharp cheddar on top, and stirred in some garlic powder, to make this more interesting.

Atkins Diet Idea: Faux Potatoes for Breakfast!

If you've ever tried the Atkins Diet, you know that boredom and cravings are the biggest reasons for falling off of it. In fact, one of the reasons that Atkins doesn't rank higher is that there is big weight loss, then people stop the diet and get fat again. Maintenance is the issue, and I've found some workarounds for that.

I like my cheese browned to crunchy goodness, so
I use the convection fan on mine. You don't have to.

Chief in importance for me are scheduled "diet breaks." Those are interludes in the diet, of a pre-set duration. When I've plateaued, but still wanted to lose more, I'll schedule a cheat day. Maybe a 2-day cheat, with the certainty that I'd begin the induction phase of Atkins again the following day. Typically, at worst you gain a pound or two, and you kick-start the diet, and start losing again. For my Christmas vacation, The Other Half and I actually took a rare cheat week, from Christmas Eve to the following week. The damage for me? Four or five pounds, which I've lost in the next eight days!

So, that is one way to keep on track, and even goose the diet into helping you lose weight.  Another is to find recipes that are not only on the diet, but delicious. I've presented several here on the blog, and you can find ideas and links to ideas here. Included there, you will find a link for my recipe for Cheesy Baked Faux Potato Casserole. It is made from cauliflower, but even a cauliflower hater will like it. I know this, because I taste tested it on a cauliflower hater (Hi, Les!). 

But, even though I've posted this recipe several times, I'm doing so again for a reason. See, on Atkins, one of the easiest meals is breakfast. Eggs--even omelets made with most common ingredients--are completely on the menu. Bacon, sausage, bacon, ham, bacon, steak and bacon are all on the menu! So that part is easy. But if you're like me, you like some carbs with breakfast too. Toast can be handled with this recipe for flaxseed focaccia bread, which isn't delicious, but is also inoffensive (which you can't say about many other bread substitutes). I've dressed up the recipe with garlic powder and cheese to make it tastier, and it makes a fine yolk-scooping substance! But you know what else is missing? Potatoes. Potatoes, rice and bread are all verboten on a low-carb diet, and I love them all. Bread I've covered. Rice is also taken care of in that link I gave you above, but here it is again.

Well, as it turns out, my Cheesy Baked Faux Potato Casserole? It makes a hell of an addition to breakfast. When we make it (and we're rarely without it), whether in single or double batch, there will always be leftovers in the fridge. Take a scoop of that and warm it up with your bacon and eggs, and you'll swear you're eating potatoes, especially from leftovers, when all the flavors have had time to settle. With this tip, and those linked above, I hope I've helped you stick to the low-carb diet. And I'm always looking for more ideas, so please let me know if you've got more! Thanks for reading.

BAKED CHEESY MASHED FAUXTATOES

1 large head of cauliflower
4 oz. cream cheese
2 Tbsp. butter
1/2-cup sour cream (or chip dip of our choice!)
1/4-cup grated Parmesan (or mozzarella, or other cheese)
Bacon bits (real ones!)
Chopped green onion, chives or sauteed white onions (to taste)
1 cup grated cheddar
Salt and pepper to taste (optional)
Garlic (optional)
Dollop heavy whipping cream (optional) 

(Extra butter, cream cheese, sour cream, whipping cream, Parmesan and cheddar cheeses, and bacon will only make this better. Use your own discretion.)

Steam cauliflower until it is soft and mushy. Mash it. Put butter and cream cheese into mixing bowl. Put hot mashed cauliflower in bowl to melt the butter and cream cheese. Put in all other ingredients except for cheddar (and save a little bacon for later), and stir it all up. Put the mixture into an 8" x 8" baking pan. Sprinkle shredded cheddar on top, along with some of the bacon. Bake at 350 for 35 minutes.

I found this at (of all places) a body building site. But who cares, it's great!

Source: forum.bodybuilding.com

Another Low Carb Treat: Cheesecake!

One of my favorite desserts has always been cheesecake. I've even requested it more than once as my birthday cake. Anyway, I've already explained several times that I'm on a modified Atkins diet, and am experimenting with recipes to make it more tolerable. And "tolerable" means not compromising taste, or at least, not by much.

So, I started thinking about desserts, and it occurred to me that cream cheese is low carb. And, that it's cheesecake's main ingredient. There had to be a recipe for it with low carb ingredients. And how hard could a faux graham cracker crust be?

As it turns out, both were doable, and there are many to choose from online. Here is the recipe I used for the crust:

"GRAHAM CRACKER" PIE CRUST

• 3 ounces almond flour, 3/4 cup
• 3 tablespoons flax meal
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• 6 tablespoons butter, melted
• 1/3 cup granular Splenda
• (I added a dollop of vanilla--Ed.)

Mix the dry ingredients in a small bowl. Pour butter and vanilla over the dry ingredients. Mix well and spread in a 9" pie plate or springform pan. Bake at 375º about 10-12 minutes until set and lightly browned. Cool, then fill the pie.

Per 1/8 Recipe: 153 Calories; 15g Fat; 3g Protein; 4g Carbohydrate; 2g Dietary Fiber; 2g Net Carbs; Per 1/12 Recipe: 102 Calories; 10g Fat; 2g Protein; 3g Carbohydrate; 1g Dietary Fiber; 2g Net Carbs

Source: Genaw

CHEESECAKE FILLING:

• 3 packages (1 and 1/2 lbs) cream cheese (room temperature)*
• 4 eggs (preferably room temperature)
• 1 and 1/2 teaspoon (1/2 Tablespoon) vanilla
• 1 and 1/2 teaspoon (1/2 Tablespoon) lemon juice (we used lime--Ed.)
• 1 and 1/3 cups sugar equivalent (Splenda) artificial sweetener 
• 1/4 cup sour cream

Heat oven to 400 F

Put (room temperature) cream cheese in mixing bowl, and beat until fluffy. Add other ingredients, scraping the bowl and beaters each time (this is very important), fully incorporating each ingredient. When all ingredients are combined, scrape one more time, beat one more minute, and pour mixture into pan over crust.

 Put the cheesecake on a sheet pan in case of drippage. After putting the cheesecake in the oven at 400 F, turn the oven down to 200 F. Bake for 60 to 90 minutes, checking often after an hour. When the cake is firm to touch but slightly soft in the center, or the center reaches 155 F, remove from oven.

Makes 16 servings.

Nutritional Information: Each serving has 2 grams effective carbohydrate plus 1 gram fiber, 6 grams protein, and 221 calories.

Source: About.com

Okay, so the cheescake in the photo is mine. It turned out spectacularly well, with the following caveats: I didn't get my cream cheese "room temperature" enough, so the batter was a bit gloppy. The crust--while incredibly delicious--is very thin in a 9" pan.  Next time, I'm going to use a smaller springform pan, and increase the crust recipe. That will make the cheesecake smaller in diameter, but thicker than my relatively flat pie. We didn't add any toppings. This sucker is calorie-laden enough as it is. But it was truly delicious. You could serve it at a party, and nobody--nobody--would have any idea it was "low carb." No way.

*I bought the 3 lb. block of Philadelphia cream cheese at Sam's Club, and cut it in half. It's enough for two cheesecakes. 

Low Carb Recipe: Pizza!

As I've said several times here, I'm on the Atkins Diet (well, a slight variation), and it's working very well. Even with a four-day "cheat" window for my trip home for Thanksgiving, the low-carb diet, along with regular exercise has led to a 30-pound weight loss. But it isn't easy, don't let anybody tell you it's easy. It isn't because you get hungry, it's because you get bored. So this time around, I'm trying new things and new combinations of things, to make the diet fun.

I'd already come up with my own low-carbohydrate pizza, which you can find here. And that particular recipe is really good, no lie. But only if you use Mission brand white tortillas. All the others I've tried are awful. Annnyway, I wanted a full-size pizza. I knew there had to be a way.

Click to embiggen

Some of the things you can use as flour substitutes are: flaxseed meal, almond flour, whey protein powder and soy flour, used in various combinations. Flax is the coolest, because it a) has as much fiber as it has carbs, which cancel each other out, and b) it has a benign, not unpleasant taste. The same cannot be said of soy flour, which I try to avoid. So for my first try at a full-size pizza, I decided to go for flax. The result can be seen in the picture, and as you can see, I can make a mean pizza. But how does it taste?

Great. I had three slices! Nobody would eat a flax-crust pizza, and not know something was different. But it's a passable substrate for my wonderful toppings. The only problem is, it's not particularly sturdy. You can pick up a slice, but it would likely crumble as you eat it. So, I'm on a quest for a stiffer crust. Whether that means adding something (xanthan gum?), or an entirely different recipe, I don't know. Perhaps a little garlic and Parmesan cheese in the batter would be good too. Anyway, if you're on Atkins, and you're bored, this isn't a bad change of pace.

I can't really give a carb count here. The recipe includes one, but I don't buy it. Pizza sauce (Ragu or store brands) has a few carbs in it, and you can compare for the lowest, but you don't need much really. The crust has virtually no net carbs in it, according to my flaxseed meal's nutritional information. Meats have nothing. Cheese has a little, but not too much. Just to be safe, be really good all day, and then use this to round out your carbs for the day!

Ingredients:

• 1 and 1/2 C flax seed meal
• 2 teaspoons baking powder
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1 teaspoon oregano
• Sweetener to equal about 1 Tablespoon of sugar
• 3 Tablespoons of oil
• 3 eggs
• 1/2 C water

Preparation:

Preheat oven to 425 F.

1. Mix dry ingredients together.
2. Add wet ingredients, and mix very well.
3. Let sit for about 5 minutes to thicken.
4. Spread on pan (I put it on a silicon mat or greased parchment paper).
5. Bake for 15-18 minutes until cooked through, then add toppings* and cook until they are done.

Nutritional Analysis: Whole crust has 7 grams of effective carbohydrate, plus 52 grams fiber, 47 grams protein, 130 grams healthy fat, and 1525 calories.

SOURCE: About.com

*My toppings included Kroger pizza sauce (not too much, just enough to spread around), pepperoni (two layers!), plenty of shredded mozzarella, a little shredded sharp cheddar, some shredded ham, crumbled bacon and more pepperoncini slices. My cook time after adding the toppings was about 15 minutes, with the convection on.

Back to Ohio, Day Two: The Aftermath

This is my second day in Ohio, the day after Thanksgiving. The first of four "cheat" days in my diet and exercise regimen, which has helped me shed 30 pounds in 2-1/2 months. Did I do any damage? Am I in a coma? Well, I'm not really sure, since I'm writing this before my departure! When I go away, I always do two things: I "seed" the blog with a few time-release posts. And, more importantly, I enlist the help of Stupid Monkey Planet, who livens things up around here considerably.

But given that this is a long, slow, food-coma weekend, both the Monkey and I are apt to only be around sporadically. Which is okay, because it is also a record low time for readers. So if you're here, what's wrong with you? There's cold turkey and mayonnaise in the fridge. You know you want to. . .

And now, some Thanksgiving weirdness, from Roseanne. . .

Low Carb Recipe: Curry Cauliflower "Rice"

I'm just past two months on this round of Atkins, and have lost about 25 pounds, with my starting weight being at or above 180. Two things have helped me achieve success this time: 1) I convinced The Other Half to join me a few weeks ago, and 2) I've gotten far more creative with my menu.

I covered a few of my new dishes earlier, and you can find them (and other links to yet more ideas) here.

This particular recipe is easier than most, and quite delicious.


CURRIED CAULIFLOWER FAUX "RICE"


1 medium-to-large head of cauliflower
4 tsp. curry powder
Green onions
Olive oil
3 cloves crushed garlic (or equivalent)
Cubed ham, beef, chicken or other meat (optional)


With a food processor or cheese grater, grate cauliflower head into rice-sized pieces, and set aside. Dice green onions (as many as you want), and sautee with garlic in olive oil in a large skillet. If you're using meat (or tofu, I suppose), cube or shred it, and put into skillet with the already cooking onions and garlic. If your meat is already cooked, go to the next step. If not, stir the meat with the onions and garlic until it is cooked. Then, pour in your riced cauliflower. Keep the skillet hot from the sautee, and just keep stirring the cauliflower together with the other ingredients, until it starts getting soft. Stir in curry powder, making sure it gets equally distributed. Continue to cook, taking a taste-test to see if it's ready. My skillet time was about 20 minutes on a big burner. It's doubtful that you'll over-cook it, so just cook it until it tastes ready.


This new cauliflower dish is one of many (again, more here), and isn't the last I'll try. For the Atkins dieter, you get to eat something that will more than pass for a rice dish. It's as good as the rice dish. The Other Half said, "We're going to have to add this to our regular dishes." It's that good. Enjoy!

KFC's Cheesy Bacon Bowl

I'd like to be appalled by this new Kentucky Fried Chicken menu item. But the truth is, I'm on the Atkins diet, and I put bacon in all kinds of things! In fact, leave out the breading on the chicken, and use mashed cauliflower instead of mashed potatoes, and this one is just about Atkins-ready! Okay, I'd have to sub something for the corn, and maybe make my own gravy, but I may have to try it.

[Excerpt]


NEWS: KFC Tries To Prove Bacon Makes Everything Better With Their Cheesy Bacon Bowl



. . .Well, KFC is taking that power and adding it to their KFC Famous Bowl to create the Cheesy Bacon Bowl. All the goodness of a KFC Famous Bowl, sprinkled with chopped bacon, and all for just $3.99 at participating restaurants. . .

Read more at: The Impulsive Buy

Thanks to Stupid Monkey Planet for the link.

Awesome Low Carb Recipe: Beef Fried Rice (Cauliflower)

This is probably my fifth time around on the Atkins Diet.  And as it is every time I actually stick to it,* it is working. I've lost 15 pounds in five weeks. As usual, I lost five pounds the first week, five the second, and then it took three weeks for the next 5. It could take three more to see a full 20, which is my goal.**  But I'll get there for sure, because this time around, I'm getting very creative.

Ranchburgers

I already know many of the tricks:

- Pepperoni, olives, pickles, cheeses, boiled eggs, sunflower seeds, low-sugar beef jerky, almonds and pumpkin seeds all make great snacks, in moderation.
- Soups that are low-carb ready are easy to make and hard to goof up (see hamburger and chicken soup recipes).
- Low-carb variations of pizzas, tuna melts and my obscure favorite, school cafeteria ranchburgers can be made using low-carb tortillas and breads that are much tastier than in the early days of Atkins.
- These and many other tips are covered here.

Cheesy Baked Fauxtatoes

I've started getting creative this go-around. I'd already made "mashed fauxtatoes" out of cauliflower (which is steamed and mashed cauliflower with butter, garlic, and whatever spices make you happy), and it's okay. But not great. I wanted some recipes that were either good or near great. I'm not expecting the world here, but I very nearly got it with my Cheesy Baked Fauxtatoes. I've already run the recipe twice, I'm so in love with it.

But you know how it is. I wanted more. I've experimented with radishes (fried, with onions and bacon). Passable, not terrific. I've experimented with flax seed meal, to pretty great effect. Flax seed bread is so much better than soy flour breads. I've tried it with garlic and cheese, but I haven't improved that one enough to share yet. So I went back to cauliflower. What if I grated it into a rice-like consistency, and tried to make a Asian-type dish with it?

It's awesome.

Beef Fried Faux Rice & Stir Fry
Click to embiggen.

Low-Carb Beef Faux Fried Rice

Small/medium cauliflower head
Soy sauce
1/2-package of Steak-Ums (or other meat)
Chopped onions (or green onion or chives or shallots)
Garlic
2 eggs
Olive oil

Use food processor or cheese grater to reduce cauliflower head to rice-sized pieces. Set aside.

Beat two eggs in a bowl. Set aside.

Pour some olive oil in a big, flat skillet, and get it hot. Toss in whatever onions you like, and some garlic. I just put a dash of this and that, whatever seems like it would be good. Toss in the Steak-um product (chopped up), or chunks of chicken or pork, or whatever meat you want to use. Just about anything would work. Stir it around for a few minutes until meat is cooked. Drain.

Stir in cauliflower. Keep the fire hot, stirring a lot. When it looks like it's starting to brown, sprinkle in however much soy sauce you want. Scoot the mixture to one side of the skillet, then pour the eggs onto the empty side. Scramble the eggs, and then stir together with the "rice" mixture. You can continue to cook if you think it's necessary. Give it a taste, you decide.

I also put oil in a second skillet at the same time, and did some stir-fry vegetables, also with some soy sauce. It was awesome. Did it taste or feel exactly like rice? No. Did it taste like cauliflower? No. But was it even a hint of "Atkins blah?" No. It's very, very good. When taking my finished bowl back to the kitchen, I actually picked around the skillet for more morsels.

I should note that this recipe is cobbled from several I read online. It doesn't crib from any one in particular. And I added my own touches. Feel free to take mine, and do what you want with it!


* And by stick to it, I mean that I do the 20 grams of carbs induction phase, move to the slightly more carbs second phase, and if my weight plateaus, I schedule a "cheat day," and then go right back on induction. This works. 


** While a total of 20 pounds lost would be great, and puts me in the "normal" range, it also puts me at 160 pounds--my 30-year-old self's fat weight. If I could get my 5-8½" body down to 155, 150, dare I say it, 145 or below? That would be awesome to do without a major illness! But 160 or slightly less would be a victory.

Best Low Carb Recipe EVER: Cheesy Cauliflower Faux Potato Bake (Revised)

It's only been a couple of weeks since I originally posted the following recipe, but I feel the need to repeat it. And scream and shout about how good this recipe is. It's amazing. It's awesome. I've made it four times. I haven't been without it for more than a few hours since I first made it.

I've tweaked the recipe slightly from the first time. For instance, you can add a little green onion or french onion chip dip if you have it. You can add whatever spices you like with au gratin or scalloped potatoes. And the more you mash the cauliflower, the better. The goal is to make this into something that even a cauliflower hater would eat.



BAKED CHEESY MASHED FAUXTATOES

1 large head of cauliflower
4 oz. cream cheese
2 Tbsp. butter
1/2-cup sour cream
1/4-cup grated Parmesan
Bacon bits (real ones!)
Chopped green onion, chives or sauteed white onions (to taste)
1 cup grated cheddar
 Salt and pepper to taste
Garlic (optional)
Dollop heavy whipping cream (optional)

(Extra butter, cream cheese, sour cream, whipping cream, Parmesan and cheddar cheeses, and bacon will only make this better. Use your own discretion.)

Steam cauliflower until it is soft and mushy. Mash it. Put butter and cream cheese into mixing bowl. Put hot mashed cauliflower in bowl to melt the butter and cream cheese. Put in all other ingredients except for cheddar (and save a little bacon for later), and stir it all up. Put the mixture into an 8" x 8" baking pan. Sprinkle shredded cheddar on top, along with some of the bacon. Bake at 350 for 35 minutes.


I found this at (of all places) a body building site. But who cares, it's great!

Source: forum.bodybuilding.com
.

Low Carb Corner: Cheesy Baked Fauxtatoes

I'm in the induction stage of the Atkins Diet again. The good news is that I've already lost 7 or 8 pounds. The bad news is that I was all the way back up to 180 pounds. Which really doesn't work on my 5' 8-1/2" body. Last time I did Atkins--I mean, really did it--I lost 23 pounds, and except for a nagging 8 pounds, I kept it off for a long time. But apparently eating normal food, even while exercising makes me a chubbo. Nice, right?

So, it's back to Atkins. But with a lot of "tries" behind me, I know how boring the diet can get. And unlike 5 or 6 years ago, there aren't a lot of people in the "low carb" business anymore. So this time, I'm looking for recipes. I already know that things like radishes and cauliflower are very low in carbs. But what can I do with them that I haven't tried?

Turns out, Google is the low-carbohydrate dieter's best friend. I haven't played around with the radishes much, except for one easy try:


BAKED RADISHES

Wash, trim and quarter your radishes. Toss them with olive oil, butter, sea salt and pepper. Bake at 400 for 15 minutes, or until they pass the baked potato test. You don't really want them firm.

Yummy, but I'm in need of something a little more flavorful. I've already tried "mashed fauxtatoes" made with cauliflower. With that, you just steam the cauliflower and mash it, maybe adding some butter, some chicken bullion, spices. . .something to improve the "meh" flavor of cauliflower (which I've always thought was better raw). But hot damn, I found something tonight!

BAKED CHEESY MASHED FAUXTATOES

1 large head of cauliflower
4 oz. cream cheese
2 Tbsp. butter
1/2-cup sour cream
1/4-cup grated Parmesan
Bacon bits (real ones!)
Chopped green onion or chives (to taste)
1 cup grated cheddar

Steam cauliflower until it is soft and mushy. Mash it. Put butter and cream cheese into mixing bowl. Put hot mashed cauliflower in bowl to melt the butter and cream cheese. Put in all other ingredients except for cheddar (and save a little bacon for later), and stir it all up. Put the mixture into an 8" x 8" baking pan. Sprinkle shredded cheddar on top, along with some of the bacon. Bake at 350 for 35 minutes.

Mine turned out fantastic. The first bite I was slightly disappointed, because I could tell it was cauliflower (I thought it might be better disguised). But as I ate a second bite and a third? I was damned near fooled into thinking I was eating twice-baked potatoes! The flavor grew and grew on me. It's just about the best Atkins-ready side dish I've ever had.  And I've since read that a little whipping cream, and some garlic powder completes the disguise. If the reviewers are to be believed, if you don't tell people, they are fooled into thinking it's a potato dish. Cool!

I found this at (of all places) a body building site. But who cares, it's great!

Source: forum.bodybuilding.com

The Fat Thing, Revisited. . .Again



In a fair and just world, this would be my "before" and "after"
pictures. Though I think I do look better than Ryan
Reynolds in a fat suit. Not saying I do, I just think I do.


Have you ever met someone who is so good looking, they're almost intimidating? I'm not talking about sexual attraction (though I wouldn't rule it out), I just mean that they're so attractive, it's overwhelming. There's a client who comes into our office from time to time who meets that description. He's dark haired, blue eyed, and has an intense gaze. He's got the reputation of a real womanizer, and I'm really not surprised about that. The first couple of times I saw him, in addition to taking all that in, I did notice that he was carrying 15-20 pounds around the middle that he could stand to lose. But the way he looked, he really pulled it off.

The next few times I saw him, I thought he probably should lay off the pizza and beer, because his 15-20 pounds had grown up to a good 30 or so. And the last time I saw him, he was pushing 45-50 more than he should. Only now, he's been carrying extra weight long enough, his hands and face are getting plump, along with the belly. Suddenly, he's not so intimidating anymore. Now, he's just starting to look like the rest of us!

At the age of 45, I find that without a great deal of effort, I quickly and easily go down the same road. I got an unfortunate blend of genes from my family: skinny genes and weight gain genes. If that seems like a contradiction, it's really not. I grew up a bean pole, literally able to eat as much and as often as I wanted, and never gained an an ounce. As I've segued from decade to decade, the metabolism has slowed down, and my "idle" weight has increased incrementally. I'm still a beanpole, with skinny arms, skinny legs, small chest and shoulders. But I've got the beans now too, with fat collecting around the stomach, butt and face. If I'm not dieting and exercising regularly, I get fat in those areas, and quickly.

At 20, my idle weight was 140. At 30, it was up to 150. At 40, It could be from 160-170, and now at 45? 180-185. Seriously. I don't have to eat a lot, I just have to eat normally and not exercise, and boom, tubbo. And like the good looking guy I mentioned, if I stay fat long enough, my hands get fat enough to change ring sizes, and my face--where the weight goes first, and leaves last--gets rounder, and rounder. Yeah, well, I'm not gonna take it.

Probably not for the last time (but who really knows), I'm hitting the Atkins Diet and the exercise again. I'd tipped the scales at at least 185 (I didn't really want to know), with only a couple of pairs of pants fitting. For a guy who wore a 28" waist in college, growing out of 34"s is just embarrassing. So, 23 out of the last 31 days, I've walked 2 to 5 miles a day. I've been low carbing it for three weeks now. I've got a ways to go, but I'm down to 177 or so. It comes off a lot more slowly than it goes on, as everyone knows.  I doubt I'll ever get down to 140 pounds again without a horrifying disease, but I will get down to less than clinically overweight, which for me is about 165. And though I'll never be so good looking that I'm intimidating, I'm kind of doubting that the guy in my example will again, either!

Diet Soda Taste Test: Citrus Blast, Mountain Dew Supernova & Voltage

I've been a big soda pop (back in Ohio, just "pop") drinker since I have been old enough to buy it. Somewhere in the late 80s, I had to switch to diet soda (damn that metabolism!). This was a little distressing, because I mostly hated artificial sweetener, and particularly diet colas. Luckily for me, the soda companies began branching out from colas and lemon/limes with their diet versions about the time my metabolism crashed. It didn't hurt that NutraSweet and other artificial sweeteners began their debut around about the same time.

I started my love affair with Diet Mountain Dew, and tried many and varied diet sodas along the way. Eventually, I could even tolerate Diet Pepsi, Diet Coke, Tab and the many other cola varieties. Of them all, the only ones I outright avoid are the diet sodas with faux vanilla flavoring. Invariably, I find them nearly undrinkable. Most of the rest make their way into my regular rotation of diet drinks. I'm one of the lucky ones who doesn't care if it is Coke, Pepsi or 7-Up/Dr. Pepper brands that are on sale. 

But I do get restless. When Pepsi's Mountain Dew came out with Diet Code Red, I was very pleased. Not only was it something new, I also really liked it. But then I watched as they released flavor after tantalizing flavor of the sugary (corn syrupy?) Dews, with no diet version. I was very jealous of the full-calorie soda drinkers, cavities and pot bellies or not. But I find full-calorie Mountain Dew varieties insufferably sweet anyway.  In the mean time, Coke's Fresca came out with some varieties like peach and cherry. Pepsi started making Diet Orange Crush again. Coke made Diet Squirt. Somebody or other came out with Diet Sun Drop. All worthy additions.

But today at Von's, I spied three new diet sodas, all from Pepsi (and all on sale). I bought them all, and decided to do a taste test. Each of the sodas was poured over ice, and allowed to sit in the glass for only a few minutes. I ate a piece of cheddar cheese before each, so that I'd start at the same relative state. Below are my findings.

Diet Citrus Blast: This soda is apparently Pepsi's attempt to rival Fresca or Squirt in the citrus/grapefruit soda realm. It's a worthy entry, certainly better than store brands of grapefruit soda. It has slightly more bite than Fresca, but less overt fizziness than Squirt. There is no discernible "diet" aftertaste, and it is quite quenching. It doesn't set itself apart, and won't be a "top 5" favorite, but it's good.

Diet Mountain Dew Supernova: Supernova is reddish purple, and is billed as a "strawberry/melon" flavored soda. It's very sweet, if a bit less so than the Code Red version of Mountain Dew. I could taste the strawberry. . .ish. Any "melon" flavor would be of the Jolly Rancher faux watermelon variety. It actually reminded me of the flavors you might find in a melted freezer pop. . .which brings me to. . .

Diet Mountain Dew Voltage: Voltage--which might get them into trouble because of Coca-Cola's sub-par Volt beverage (nope, I was confused, that's Vault soda)--is light blue in color. It is billed as a raspberry/citrus flavor (blue raspberries?). While the drink is quenching, it has an indistinct, vague flavor problem. Again, it reminds me of the freeze pop example, with a hard to pinpoint "fruit" flavor. It's a fruit, but what's the fruit?

Supernova Voltage Blast "Suicide": Since I had three cans of soda opened, I finished them off as a "suicide" mixture of all three. You know what? It only suffers in comparison to Citrus Blast. As a combination, it is still a mixture of indistinct flavors.

None of the sodas is bad. In fact, should they stick around, I'll probably continue to buy them if they're on sale, if for no other reason than to give me options when I want a soda. Of the three, only Diet Citrus Blast will make it into regular rotation. But even it suffers from the Pepsi Syndrome: sodas named so generically, they could be store brands (see: Sierra Mist, Slice, Storm, Teem). 

Anyway, log story short, enjoy them while they last, I doubt that the Dew varieties will last long, and I wouldn't get attached to the generically named Citrus Blast either. But any or all of them would mix just fine with vodka. But then again, what doesn't?

The best diet drinks for me are in this order:

- Diet Mountain Dew (and if in a pinch, most store brand version like Kroger's Diet Citrus Drop)
- Diet Mountain Dew Code Red
- Diet Orange Crush (and Diet Orange Sunkist, though it has caffeine)
- Coke Zero (tastes very much like Coca-Cola Classic)
- Fresca (original and peach)
- These new Mountain Dews will slot right here in the middle, for novelty value alone
- Tab
- Diet Coke with Lime (or slightly less so, Diet Pepsi Lime)
- Lemon/Limes, like 7-Up, Sprite Zero (pretty good), Diet Sierra Mist (several varieties)
- Assorted oddballs like Diet Rite White Grape, Tangerine, Raspberry, etc.
- Assorted flavors like diet root beers, diet ginger ales, diet cream sodas, many brands
- The rest of the diet colas, regular or with cherry round up the lower end of my scale
- Just say "no" to any variety with vanilla