Blast from the Past: Sex in Song!

The other day, I let my phone run out of juice, utterly, by mistake. For whatever reason, it was taking forever to recharge, so when I went walking, I took an old MP3 player for company. I'd forgotten I'd loaded my old Philips GoGear with new tunes last time I used it. And I'm still astonished as old as this thing is (512 MB!), that it's still a great little player.

Anyway, I must've been in a frisky mood when I put this playlist together. After a couple of ordinary songs (Aquarius by 5th Dimension, a little Annie Lennox), suddenly it segued into just sexy, sexy songs. I thought it would make for a good subject for Blast from the Past, and here we are. All because I forgot to charge my phone.

1. Love to Love You Baby by Donna Summer (1975) - A song so filthy, Summer wouldn't sing it during her "born again" phase.

2. I Want Your Sex by George Michael (1987) - This is from back when George was pretending he was straight. And at the time, it was just about as dirty as you could get on the radio.



3. Sex (I'm A. . .) by Berlin (1982) - This one always cracked me up, because Terri Nunn was so inventive, and the guy is just "I'm a man!"

4. Wicked Game by Chris Isaak (1989) - This song's lyrics aren't explicit, but it just drips with sex, and the video? Scorching.



5. Honey, Honey by ABBA (1974) - What, ABBA could get sexy. Yes, with a deceptive candy coating. This one is anything but innocent, which was proven in the musical, where this song was used while reading Mom's tawdry diary!

6. I Touch Myself by Divinyls (1990) - The (sadly) late Christina Amphlett is loving herself in this one, but she's doing so while telling her lover what she'd rather be doing!



7. Touch Me (I Want Your Body) by Samantha Fox (1986) - Fox was always an embodiment of the nasty/nice girl, looking so pretty, but also kinda slutty. I'm sure when guys who lusted after her in the 80s found out she was gay, really wish they had that juicy detail back then!

8. Boom Boom (Let's Go Back to My Room) by Paul Lekakis (1987) - My, the gays are well represented on this list, aren't they? You've got your gay favorites, and your actually gay artists! And here's one who was the male flip-side (uh, so to speak) to Samantha Fox.



9. Relax by Frankie Goes to Hollywood (1983) - See? This one is as gay as you can get, and also as dirty/sexy as you can get (practically, I mean check out #10). There's a crescendo in the song that's just nothing but a musical orgasm. And the lyrics are hardly subtle.

10. Closer (to God) by Nine Inch Nails (1994) - By far the most profane song on this list, it is also the outright sexiest. Picture it: mid-90s in a Las Vegas nightclub. Two lipstick lesbians writhing to this song, from its slower parts to its wind-up to its frenzied climax, and then the gentle finish. Let me tell you, everyone was spent when they were done, and this was a men's gay bar! Awesome, filthy, sexy song.



And now that you're all hot and bothered, you have to go to work! Happy Monday, have a great week everybody.

Divinyls Lead Singer Dead at 53

Awww. Though I was never really a Divinyls fan exactly, I always loved their song I Touch Myself, and really liked the lead singer's performance on that song and in the video. Christina "Chrissy" Amphlett died much too young of breast cancer. RIP.

[Excerpt]


Divinyls Singer Christina Amphlett Dies at Age 53

Christina "Chrissy" Amphlett--frontwoman for the Australian rock band the Divinyls, whose "I Touch Myself" went to number four on the Billboard Hot 100 singles chart in 1991--died Sunday at her home in New York. Amphlett was 53 years old. . .

Read more at: Yahoo!

Christian Right: Masturbation is Gay

Hmm. Kinda sexy. Is that wrong?
Image from source.

The right wing has made great strides since the Tea Party took over. Oh, we can't govern for shit, but they won governorships, Congressional seats, and all kinds of offices in 2010. But the rhetoric is starting to get a little too restrictive. A little too limited. I mean, Rick Santorum (and, unwittingly, Mitt Romney) are advocating getting rid of contraceptives. And now we've got this uber-Christian dude (kinda hot in his Mickey Mouse shirt) saying you can't masturbate because it's GAY! C'mon, dude? You can't have premarital sex, and you can't have one off the wrist? Really? Free entertainment, right out the window? Somebody buy this dude a Fleshlight.


[Excerpt]

Christian Right Wing Pastor Mark Driscoll Says Masturbation Is Form Of Homosexuality

The Christian Right has much to say about homosexuality. Fred Phelpsl says God hates them and stages protests at the funerals of American soldiers to bring attention to his hatred. An anti-gay Christian Right wing activist recently said there wasn’t any proof that LBGT people exist. And most recently, a conservative crowd booed a gay soldier during a GOP Debate. Now a “pastor” on the Christian Right is saying that masturbation is a form of homosexuality. . .

Read more at: Addicting Info

Teabagger Candidate Against. . .You Know. . .Solitaire

The classic sitcom Seinfeld managed to do a whole episode on this topic ("The Contest") in which they never mentioned the act in question. They didn't need to. Everybody does it, and those who claim that they don't are almost assuredly lying. Seinfeld also never once claimed there was anything wrong with it (much like the companion episode "The Outing"). So, if you're a politician who is "Queen of the Castle" and thinks everyone should be the "Master of their Domain," you're up against some pretty stiff opposition. Ahem.

Sure, you're not going to meet much of a vocal backlash.  But you can bet, once they get behind that curtain, they're going to do something you don't like. Vote against you.  And it doesn't really matter how hard they pull that lever.  Ahem.


[Excerpt]

Delaware Tea Party candidate running in GOP U.S. Senate race publicly opposes masturbation

Christine O'Donnell and her interesting take on human sexuality and morality clearly was going to come back to haunt her, but common sense should have told her that appearing on a show called "Sex In The 90s", it may come up if you run for office. . .  Read more at: Pam's House Blend

Sean Hannity "Interviews" ex-Beauty Queen Carrie Prejean

Image from 05News

Or, himbo interviews bimbo. Seriously, Hannity is the guy who wrote the foreword to Prejean's new book. Which she's hawking on his show, while being interviewed by him. So you just know this is going to be a hard-hitting, no holds barred inquisition, right? Well, no. In fact both the host and subject do their very best to downplay this scandal as an attack on Miss Prejean's "free speech rights."

Um, what? This girl gave an almost unintelligible answer about gay marriage to a question from a super gay judge (Perez Hilton), and hasn't shut up about it since. She's no doubt much more famous, and now infamous (thanks to her "wind blown" accidentally half nude shots, and her solo "performance" art sex tape) than she ever would have been had she won the damned pageant. And I tell you what, I'm not buying her story. From the descriptions of the video, the camera starts at her. . .fingers. . .and pans to her vacuous face. Yet she claims she was alone when the video was shot? Who was running the camera, Carrie? Even if it weren't for that bit of contradiction, the expressions on her face would betray her anyway. She punctuates most of her words in her explanation with Tex Avery-style eye bugging that practically screams "I'm lying!!!"

Kung Fu Star David Carradine's Strange Death

Photo from source, Asylum

When I heard on the way to work the other day that David Carradine had died, I thought it was sad, but didn't give it much thought. Then, when I heard he'd committed suicide, I was a little stunned. I wondered, was he in bad health? It just didn't seem to make sense.

But the story took a strange turn, and it would seem--at least for now--that he died from "auto-erotic asphyxiation." The first time I heard the phrase, was in an episode of The X-Files, when a psychic character played by Peter Boyle predicted that David Duchovny's character Fox Mulder would meet his end that way. At the time, I thought it meant something slightly different, with me thinking that Mulder must be spectacularly endowed if he could choke himself with it. When I found out what it really meant, the scene was no less funny, but the mental image wasn't as impressive. And given Duchovny's much publicized sex addiction, it doesn't even seem unlikely.

Michael Hutchence, the lead singer of INXS is probably the most famous accident victim of the practice, but that one is somewhat in dispute. Some people think he really did try to kill himself, and that auto-erotic asphyxiation was a cover for it. Why that would seem better to anybody, I have no idea.

[Excerpt]

A Brief History of Erotic Asphyxiation

Initially, it was the sad death of a 72-year-old. Then it was a suicide. Then there was a rope found around his genitals. Now investigators are suggesting screen legend David Carradine accidentally killed himself during a practice known as erotic asphyxiation, or intentionally cutting off oxygen to the brain for sexual arousal. . .

Read more at: Asylum

GOP's 14-Year-Old "Wunderkind" Jonathan Krohn

Just a couple of days ago, I ran a post called Today's GOP: A Cast of Cartoon Characters, where I pointed out what an assortment of oddballs currently lead the Republican Party. Sometimes these folks disown the title "Republican," and opt for "conservative," but they're pretty much interchangeable these days.

Anyway, one of the current crop I left out was 14-year-old Jonathan Krohn. He's deemed a "Wunderkind," and is treated with as much awe as are many of the others in the CPAC bunch. Now, Jon may be a nice enough kid--politics aside--but c'mon. He's 14. He's the age most of us are when we're trying to figure out the best time to sneak away and lock ourselves in the bathroom for goodness' sake. But there he is on (surprise, surprise) FOX "News," opining away.

Something Can Cut Prostate Cancer Risk

Photo from Blogmunch

And what is that something? Well, it's something few people admit to, but almost everybody does. It's something religion frowns upon. It's something that Seinfeld once did a complete episode about, without ever mentioning. Does "master of my domain" mean anything to you? Well, it turns out, you don't want to be the master. . .you want to be the. . .uh. . .masterbator.

This story should make a lot of people very happy.

[Excerpt]

Masturbation 'cuts cancer risk'

Men could reduce their risk of developing prostate cancer through regular masturbation, researchers suggest.

They say cancer-causing chemicals could build up in the prostate if men do not ejaculate regularly. . .

Read more (you know you want to) at: BBC News