Frivolity Break: Would You Have Sex with Paul Rudd?

I'm tired, and didn't get around to blogging for Wednesday. Sorry. Here's something funny to watch instead. Oh, and the obvious answer to the above is, "Yes, please."

Billy on the Street: Would You Have Sex with Paul Rudd? from Billy on the Street

Carlos Danger Man! (Rocky Mountain Mike Song Parody)

Anthony Weiner gets the Rocky Mountain Mike Treatment, for his online cruising name, "Carlos Danger." To the tune of (what else?) Secret Agent Man by Johnny Rivers.

 

Blast from the Past: Sex in Song!

The other day, I let my phone run out of juice, utterly, by mistake. For whatever reason, it was taking forever to recharge, so when I went walking, I took an old MP3 player for company. I'd forgotten I'd loaded my old Philips GoGear with new tunes last time I used it. And I'm still astonished as old as this thing is (512 MB!), that it's still a great little player.

Anyway, I must've been in a frisky mood when I put this playlist together. After a couple of ordinary songs (Aquarius by 5th Dimension, a little Annie Lennox), suddenly it segued into just sexy, sexy songs. I thought it would make for a good subject for Blast from the Past, and here we are. All because I forgot to charge my phone.

1. Love to Love You Baby by Donna Summer (1975) - A song so filthy, Summer wouldn't sing it during her "born again" phase.

2. I Want Your Sex by George Michael (1987) - This is from back when George was pretending he was straight. And at the time, it was just about as dirty as you could get on the radio.



3. Sex (I'm A. . .) by Berlin (1982) - This one always cracked me up, because Terri Nunn was so inventive, and the guy is just "I'm a man!"

4. Wicked Game by Chris Isaak (1989) - This song's lyrics aren't explicit, but it just drips with sex, and the video? Scorching.



5. Honey, Honey by ABBA (1974) - What, ABBA could get sexy. Yes, with a deceptive candy coating. This one is anything but innocent, which was proven in the musical, where this song was used while reading Mom's tawdry diary!

6. I Touch Myself by Divinyls (1990) - The (sadly) late Christina Amphlett is loving herself in this one, but she's doing so while telling her lover what she'd rather be doing!



7. Touch Me (I Want Your Body) by Samantha Fox (1986) - Fox was always an embodiment of the nasty/nice girl, looking so pretty, but also kinda slutty. I'm sure when guys who lusted after her in the 80s found out she was gay, really wish they had that juicy detail back then!

8. Boom Boom (Let's Go Back to My Room) by Paul Lekakis (1987) - My, the gays are well represented on this list, aren't they? You've got your gay favorites, and your actually gay artists! And here's one who was the male flip-side (uh, so to speak) to Samantha Fox.



9. Relax by Frankie Goes to Hollywood (1983) - See? This one is as gay as you can get, and also as dirty/sexy as you can get (practically, I mean check out #10). There's a crescendo in the song that's just nothing but a musical orgasm. And the lyrics are hardly subtle.

10. Closer (to God) by Nine Inch Nails (1994) - By far the most profane song on this list, it is also the outright sexiest. Picture it: mid-90s in a Las Vegas nightclub. Two lipstick lesbians writhing to this song, from its slower parts to its wind-up to its frenzied climax, and then the gentle finish. Let me tell you, everyone was spent when they were done, and this was a men's gay bar! Awesome, filthy, sexy song.



And now that you're all hot and bothered, you have to go to work! Happy Monday, have a great week everybody.

John Fugelsang on Why Virginia is Not for Lovers

Anthony Weiner: Clear and Carlos Danger!

By now you know about aspiring New York Mayor Anthony Weiner's latest "not really sex" scandal, in which he referred to himself in sexting as "Carlos Danger." Ira Verklempt, maybe. Irving Meshugga? Anyway, he's got all new nekkid pix with something for the foot fetishists, and something for those who are into pixelization (if anyone can hook me up with the uncensored ones, forward them on, y'hear?). So, don't let it be said that I can't poke fun at a Democrat. And I probably shouldn't have said poke.

Source: Wonkette

Harry Reid says Mitch McConnell ‘Tried to Make Love to the Tea Party’

Posted for two reasons: a) to give credit to Harry Reid, who I often criticize for being to milquetoast, and b) so that I could make and post this graphic!

[Excerpt]

Harry Reid says Mitch McConnell ‘tried to make love to the tea party’

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) vowed Monday that Democrats would hold onto their Senate majority and mocked Mitch McConnell for failing to placate restive tea party critics. . .

Read more at: Washington Post

Virginia is for BORING Lovers?

There's got to be an easier (and more
Constitutional) way to "keep kids safe."

I swear, the GOP is getting meaner and weirder, and leaning toward batshit crazy, particularly at the state level. I mean, how do you explain an attorney general, aspiring-to-be-governor, who wants to reinstate a sodomy law. Not the kind of sodomy you're thinking of (though it's that too), but basically the really broad definition that includes just about everything but the missionary position. Who is the target audience for lawmaking like this? What in the world is the base this man covets?

[Excerpt]

Virginia Gubernatorial Candidate Campaigns On Effort To Restore Ban On Oral Sex

In an unusual move, Virginia Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli II (R), his party’s nominee for governor, launched a new campaign website Wednesday highlighting his efforts to reinstate Virginia’s unconstitutional Crimes Against Nature law. The rule, which makes felons out of even consenting married couples who engage in oral or anal sex in the privacy of their own homes, was struck down by federal courts after Cuccinelli blocked efforts to bring it in line with the Supreme Court’s 2003 Lawrence v. Texas ruling. . .

Read more at: Think Progress

Republican War on Sex!

Rick Santorum, Patron Saint of
un-fun sex and/or no sex.

In the last couple of weeks, I've reacted to some news reports with utter disbelief. When you hear that an aspiring candidate for Governor of Virginia wants to resurrect a sodomy (meaning only missionary position straight sex) law, and another one in Montana, and several other squabbles having to to with sex and sexuality, you're like. . .what year is this?

I'm really thinking this is the last gasp, the final spasm of the religious prudes of America. Unfortunately, it's a very large body doing the gasping and twitching, so the disturbing spectacle may take a while to play out. But think about this. Regardless of a particular politician's personal parochial peccadilloes (how's that for alliteration?), what constituency are you playing to, when you're aiming for the "missionary, post-marital sex, ONLY" crowd? What is that, like a half dozen people?

[Excerpt]

11 Actions That Prove Republicans Are Intent On Making 2013 A Terrible Year For Sex 

Move over "war on women," the GOP's "war on sex" is here to invade your bedroom and reproductive system. . .

Read more at: Huffington Post

Virginia Sodomy Law Will Not Be Resurrected

He's sure got a purty mouth. . .Image from source.

Virginia Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli--courting a mystery constituency of voters who don't like any kind of sex beyond married missionary-style--was for some reason trying to resurrect Virginia's sodomy law. "Crimes against nature" they called it, apparently knowing nothing of nature. So, Virginia can keep their "Virginia is for lovers" slogan. But who knows if The Cooch can keep his chances of running successfully for Governor?

[Excerpt]

Cuccinelli denied sodomy ruling rehearing

The Fourth Circuit U.S. Court of Appeals in Richmond issued an order on Monday denying a petition by Virginia Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli asking the full 15-judge court to reconsider a decision by a three-judge panel last month that overturned the state’s sodomy law.
In an action that surprised some court observers, the order says none of the court’s judges requested a poll among themselves to determine which, if any of them, favored Cuccinelli’s request for an en banc rehearing of the sodomy case by the court’s 15 active judges and one senior judge. . .

Read more at: Washington Blade

WTF: Virginia Atty General Wants to Uphold Sodomy Law?

Sometimes WTF is the only response that you can come up with at first, isn't? I mean seriously, what would motivate a politician who has grand ambitions be for something like making sodomy illegal again? Forget for a second that the Supreme Court ruled such laws unconstitutional a decade ago--and was late doing that. But we're not talking about just the "gay"kind of sodomy you're likely thinking of when you hear the word. We're talking pretty much anything but missionary position by any  combination of genders. Yeah. Let that sink in for a minute, and then tell me exactly what constituency this guy is aiming for? What percent of the population would say, "Oh, yeah. That's my guy."

Gov. Missionary, from HuffPo

[Excerpt]

Ken Cuccinelli, Virginia Attorney General, Petitions To Uphold Anti-Sodomy Law 

Virginia Attorney General and gubernatorial candidate Ken Cuccinelli has filed a petition challenging a ruling that recently struck down the state's anti-sodomy law. . .

Read more at: Huffington Post

Hobby Lobby: WTF?

Odd name for a church.

I know, where have I been, right? Well, it's Christmas vacation, darn it, and I just haven't felt like blogging. Plus, I've been catching up on some chores around this joint. Anyway. . .

I break my break for this comment on the idiocy of religious nutcases. Oh, as an atheist, I might have a slightly lower bar for what I consider nutty about religion. But really, who the hell does the Hobby Lobby management think they are? Why on earth would the owners' own religious beliefs be imposed upon their employees? And who the hell would want their boss to be the final arbiter of your contraception coverage on your health care plan? It's crazy.

It's even crazier when you consider that almost everyone uses contraception, religious or not. Listen you big dumbbells at Hobby Lobby and like-minded companies: your employees don't have to follow your religion or any religion. It's not up to you to make "moral" decisions for them. Unless you certify your business as a church, and your employees are all 100% on-board congregants, you don't have that right. And more than that, you're damaging your brand while playing to. . .who exactly?

[Excerpt]

Hobby Lobby plans to face $1.3 million in daily fines for defying contraception mandate

An attorney representing the Hobby Lobby chain of arts and crafts stores said that the company intends to defy a court order that it comply with the Affordable Care Act (ACA)’s provisions regarding contraceptives, the so-called “morning after pill” and employee health coverage. According to Associated Press, the company says that it is willing to face the up to $1.3 million in fines it will accrue per day by not providing coverage for the medications. . . 

Read more at: Raw Story

GOP Senate Candidates Can't Shut Up About Rape

Image from source, Wonkette

Seriously, WTF you guys? If you know you have ridiculous, douchey, inappropriate and insensitive ideas about something, why do you keep talking about it? We know that you think sex for pleasure is always wrong, sex within marriage is for procreation only, rape is only sometimes "rape," and that a sperm cell that has just penetrated an egg (or maybe is about to) is the same thing as a fully-formed human being. But every time you talk about it, it shines a spotlight on all of those ludicrous ideas.  But look who I'm talking to! These guys also seem to think they're fooling us with their comb-overs.

[Excerpt]

Yet Another GOP Senate Candidate Says Something About Rape

New Rule of Politics: If you’re a Republican running for Senate, just never talk about sex or anything related to it. You will do better pretending storks bring babies to worthy parents and/or welfare applicants. . .

Read more at: Wonkette

Romney Not on Board with "Legitimate Rape" Remark

Dude, is that a legitimate comb-over?
Image from source, CBS News.

Okay, kids, if there's one thing I've learned from years of following politics, current events, and. . .uh. . .living as a human on this earth, I know there is one thing you don't mess with: rape. You don't try to parse, bargain about, hand wave or poo-pooh rape. You just don't. Women (and people in general) are not just thorny on the subject, they will take your freakin' head off.

So, how does a person rise to the level of Congressman without knowing this basic fact? This douche nozzle actually tried to whittle rape down to "legitimate rape," and. . .I don't know, "kinda-sorta rape?" And then he peddled some phony-baloney psuedo science about a woman's body preventing pregnancy if there is a real, 100%, bona fide, sure as shootin' rape.

WTF on several levels, man? So, it's not exactly an act of political courage for presidential hopeful Mitt Romney to condemn such language. Or is it? Some of his base is batshit crazy on "personhood." Maybe he lost a few of the rabid pro-lifers with this statement? Who knows. We do know that Paul Ryan is against exceptions of rape and incest for abortion. What does he think about "legitimate" rape?

[Excerpt]

Romney rebukes Akin rape remark

Missouri Congressman Todd Akin, a conservative Republican candidate for the U.S. Senate, said in an interview broadcast Sunday that women's bodies can prevent pregnancies in the case of "a legitimate rape," adding that conception in such cases is rare. . .

Read more at: CBS News

Video Compilation of Limbaugh Attacking Sandra Fluke 70 Times

Image found at Sodahead

When discussing the Rush Limbaugh/Sandra Fluke story, it is always important to point out that Rush wasn't just wrong for treating a private citizen that way. He had the entire story wrong. Nothing he said bore relation to reality. Fluke wasn't talking about her own sex life. She wasn't talking about anyone's sex life. In fact, a major part of what she was talking about was contraception as medicine. It had nothing to do with taxpayer funding.

I've said all of this before, but it doesn't really seem to be sinking in. The Rush fans and FReepers are still calling Fluke a slut, heedless of the fact that it's all in pig boy's fetid mind. Pisses me off. And the ones who feel the need to try to save face have tried to make some sort of point using Bill Maher calling Sarah Palin names. Which is the classic apples-to-oranges comparison.  Aside from the fact that Palin is a public figure, she was used as a punch line. Limbaugh used Fluke as a punching bag. Don't believe me, watch this:

Found at: AmericaBlog.com

Jon Stewart on Virginia's "Trans-vaginal Probe" Law

You know, I've often said here that as a middle-aged gay man in a long-term same-sex marriage, the subjects of birth control and abortion are just not my issues. At all. But even I can see the insanity being rained down by the GOP on both local and national stages. For instance, only a loon would say that the "morning after" clump of cells is a person. And most people probably think that these personhood proposals don't intentionally rule out whole classes of contraception. They'd be wrong about that. I've recently learned that the right-to-life crowd has moved beyond fretting about third, second or even first trimester pregnancies, and right up to the second the sperm meets the egg. Insanity.

But the anti-abortion measures being taken up in Virginia lower the bar on insanity. Government mandated, medically unnecessary, trans-vaginal probing? THIS is smaller government? WTF? Something this crazy can only be adequately dissected by The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. Because it belongs on Comedy Central.

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Punanny State - Virginia's Transvaginal Ultrasound Bill
www.thedailyshow.com
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Santorum: The Democratic Party Is About Sexual Freedom

Image from Think Progress

Oh, Frothy! Again with the stupid. Doesn't Rick (don't Google me) Santorum know that sex is popular?  Not just the homo kind, either! So, if the Democratic Party is all about "sexual freedom?" I'm glad I signed up! Now, what does that mean the Republican Party stands for?

[Excerpt]


Santorum: The Democratic Party Is About ‘Homosexuality’

“. . .Woodstock is the great American orgy. This is who the Democratic Party has become. They have become the party of Woodstock. The prey upon our most basic primal lusts, and that’s sex. And the whole abortion culture, it’s not about life. It’s about sexual freedom. That’s what it’s about. Homosexuality. It’s about sexual freedom. . .”

Read more at: Think Progress

Christian Right: Masturbation is Gay

Hmm. Kinda sexy. Is that wrong?
Image from source.

The right wing has made great strides since the Tea Party took over. Oh, we can't govern for shit, but they won governorships, Congressional seats, and all kinds of offices in 2010. But the rhetoric is starting to get a little too restrictive. A little too limited. I mean, Rick Santorum (and, unwittingly, Mitt Romney) are advocating getting rid of contraceptives. And now we've got this uber-Christian dude (kinda hot in his Mickey Mouse shirt) saying you can't masturbate because it's GAY! C'mon, dude? You can't have premarital sex, and you can't have one off the wrist? Really? Free entertainment, right out the window? Somebody buy this dude a Fleshlight.


[Excerpt]

Christian Right Wing Pastor Mark Driscoll Says Masturbation Is Form Of Homosexuality

The Christian Right has much to say about homosexuality. Fred Phelpsl says God hates them and stages protests at the funerals of American soldiers to bring attention to his hatred. An anti-gay Christian Right wing activist recently said there wasn’t any proof that LBGT people exist. And most recently, a conservative crowd booed a gay soldier during a GOP Debate. Now a “pastor” on the Christian Right is saying that masturbation is a form of homosexuality. . .

Read more at: Addicting Info

Rachel Maddow Teaches Mitt Romney About Lady Parts

I know that the last post was a Maddow post, but I can't help it. In this segment, Rachel reports from the man cave, to explain to Mitt Romney about lady parts, and the basics of conception. Why? Because Mittens agreed to support the idea that life begins at conception. What's the matter with that idea? Well, besides the generally agreed-upon "life begins at implantation," the fact that a large percentage of birth control prevents implantation after conception. Which causes "life at conception" laws to make many forms of contraception illegal. Go for it, America, I'm gay, it doesn't matter to me. But does it matter to you?

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Product Placement: King Size Package, Low, Low Price

What do you do if you're a big, big man, but only have a pocket full of change? Get your jumbo package wrapped at Big Lots for just three bucks! Now, if you can scrape up a few more bucks, maybe you can take your Craig's List date out to Jack in the Box.  And again, sorry for the blur. I've got to get the hang of this camera!

FBI: Suspicious Fliers Were Not 'Making Out'

Helpful tip: don't do a Google
search for "mile high club"
unless you use safe search.
Image from Fiked.

Whew! Well I'll bet you're relieved to learn that! This story morphed from lengthy bathroom visits, to two girls and a guy "making out," to just the two guys gettin' busy. Apparently, they just really, really had to go. In any event, they got a fighter jet escort! Wheee!

[Excerpt]

FBI: Suspicious fliers were not 'making out'
 
It might make a good story, but it appears that none of the three passengers who raised concerns of suspicious activity on a Sunday flight were "making out" in the bathroom.

That's according to FBI Detroit spokeswoman Sandra Berchtold, who tells the Detroit Free Press that none of the passengers using the bathroom went at the same time. . .

Read more at: USAToday