Takin' All Your Guns (Rocky Mountain Mike Song Parody)

Here's hoping Rocky Mountain Mike gets settled in his less mountainous environs, and is able to keep making these rocking and raucous parodies! To the tune of--of course--Take it on the Run by REO Speedwagon. Enjoy!

So, Okay, Glenn Beck Was Talking to Sarah Palin. . .

First I got stuck in a string of Arizona shooting posts, then I went off on a tangent involving Glenn Beck, and now I seem to be stuck in another rut.  And what a scary rut it is. I know, usually I'm laughing at or feeling sorry for Beck. I also lament the near cult-leader like status he has among many of his fans. But this week, Beck has unwittingly peeled back one of the scarier corners of right-wing world.

It all started after the Saturday attack on Rep. Gabrielle Giffords, after somebody realized that Giffords had been on Sarah Palin's creepy "target" list.  Bloggers wagged a finger (me included), and the news started reporting it. Though most of those who mentioned it couched it in the context akin to "we don't know if the shooter even knew about the Palin graphic, but she still ought to be ashamed of herself" if they editorialized at all. No matter, the right instantly accused the left of "politicizing" the tragedy (something they'd never do, of course), and said that the left was blaming Palin for the shooting. Did some bloggers or commenters blame her? I don't doubt it. But I've gotta say, most people weren't blaming her. I know I wasn't.



Sorry, a little levity is required here.

Anyway, in this back-and-forth flame war, Palin's name has come up an awful lot, and along with her, Beck. So naturally, Beck had a discussion with Palin (via emails) on his radio show. So far, nothing too alarming, right? But in his kiss up/suck up to Palin, Beck slobbered the following: "But please look into protection for your family. An attempt on you could bring the republic down."

When I heard that, I rolled my eyes, and delivered a Kristin Wiig Aunt Linda impression: "Oh, brother!"  But later in the day, I decided to look up the topic on the far-right internet outpost, Free Republic. And there, oh, brother doesn't come close to covering it. Now, remember, this is a group that is in defiant denial that their side espouses extremist, dangerous rhetoric.  To them, Jared Loughner was a disturbed individual who was not influenced by Palin, Beck or anyone else on the right. . .but maybe he got some ideas from the left.

And yet, these FReepers took Glenn Beck's suck-up scenario to heart, and spewed forth some of the vilest, scariest, most out-of-scale stuff I've ever read there. And that is saying something, let me tell you.  Here's just a sampling:

"They'd better hope it never happens. It would make Fort Sumter look like a Kindergarten classroom."

"The bullet that would bring down a Palin or a Beck would be the first bullet in Revolution II, They would be Martyrs and heroes with their faces on the New Gold Backed Dollars. Lots of people would die and the nation ripped to pieces in the process. Lets pray this never happens to our great land. Still, I am starting to believe that this land needs to be purges of her sins, as in the Civil War."

[Paradoxically, the same person who wrote that second quote finished with this:] "Let us work to heal the nation—not divide her more!"

"If ONE hair is harmed on Sarah Palin’s head, Glenn is right, it is the end of our republic..of course the leftist media would be celebrating. . ."

"The ultimate insanity! The left have closed themselves up in cities with no food and no guns.  The right controls all of the food, all of the fuel, most of the water, and virtually all of the guns and the knowledge to use them.  Bad situation to initiate hostilities!"

There is a lot more, and to be fair, there is a bit of dissent there too. But the big thing I wonder (among many others) is why the FReepers think that Loughner was just a kook, but if a kook just like him went after their hero, they'd start a war against liberals? And they think liberals were overreacting? 

I'm not sure I can recommend checking out the source material, but if you're so inclined, it's all there at: FreeRepublic.com

Iowa Congressional Candidate: Put Microchips in Illegals!

Image from source, Huffington Post

The political barometer in this country is just spinning right into crazy territory, isn't it?  Putting microchips in people? Really? Isn't this the kind of thing the rapture-ready Christians like Pat Robertson and Tim LaHaye have been warning about? Isn't it supposed to be The Mark of the Beast™?  And proposed by a Republican, no less.

[Excerpt]

Pat Bertroche: Iowa Congressional Candidate Wants Microchips In Illegal Immigrants

Illegal immigrants: can't live with them, can't put them on leashes, like human chattel. But at least one Republican candidate for the 3rd District Congressional primary in Iowa, birthplace of presidential primaries, wants to do something about this dilemma. By which I mean to say he wants to implant microchip tracking devices inside illegal aliens, because why not, right? Then we can all keep tabs on them with our android phones! . . .

Read more at: Huffington Post

Thanks to Tracy for the link.

Get Ready to Show Your Papers in Arizona

Image from source, MSNBC

This is insane. You don't have to go very far in modern politics to see insane over-reactions, do you?  So, the Police in Arizona will now be compelled to demand any "suspicious" person's papers on sight.  Forget that recognizing illegal aliens on sight is downright impossible. Forget that--despite the batshit insane Governor's insistence--this has to lead to racial profiling.  Remember this: Republicans and conservatives in the state of Arizona have abandoned their "smaller government" principles.  They don't think it is a government over-step to have all people in Arizona carry their citizenship paper by mandate.  They don't think it will be an affront to a person's civil rights to lock them up if they don't have a passport or birth certificate on them at all times.  In case you didn't notice, the birthers won one.  As I said, it's insane.

[Excerpt]

Ariz. governor signs toughest immigration law

Gov. Jan Brewer ignored criticism from President Barack Obama on Friday and signed into law a bill supporters said would take handcuffs off police in dealing with illegal immigration in Arizona, the nation's busiest gateway for human and drug smuggling from Mexico. . .

Read more at: MSNBC

Another Shoe Bomber? Uh, Not So Much.

Image from source, ABC News

Note to self: do not joke about lighting my shoes on fire on a plane. Darn, and it's my favorite joke too. . .

[Excerpt]

FBI: No Explosives Found on United Jet in Denver

FBI agents say no explosives were found in the shoes of a Qatar diplomat who was subdued by federal air marshals on a United flight to Denver Wednesday night after allegedly telling the marshals, "I'm lighting my shoes on fire."

Authorities say the diplomat was wrestled to the ground and two F-16 fighter jets were dispatched to accompany the 757 on the final 40 minutes of its flight to Denver. Flight 663 originated from Washington Reagan airport. . .

Read more at: ABC News by way of Stupid Monkey Planet

And Now A Word from the FReepers on Health Care Reform

Image--no, I don't understand what Obama has to do with The Joker Either--from source, Free Republic

You knew that the passage of health care would throw some right-wingers into a tizzy. So it is no surprise that the FReepers over at FreeRepublic are having a shit fit over it. But did you expect this?

[Excerpts]

"They all deserve to burn in tragic fires."

"TIME TO FIGHT!"

".....pick up your arms and revolt. . . . . NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Payback is coming. They will wondering everyday when it will come."

"F*CK OBAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"EXACTLY!!!! and the frickin government can come and git me!"

"I’ve never felt anything like what I’m feeling today. Not even on 9/11. It’s hard to even look at my girls without crying."

"Civil Disobedience will have to be the name of the game. Voting, for now, will be for fools."

"Then he’s going on vacation....I hope a shark eats him."

"I very sincerely hope not everyone is loading mags right now, Actually, in my case they are referred to as "belts"..... "

"I feel like a Jew on the night the Nuremberg Laws were passed."

Much more, just like that at: Free Republic

A Coup Against Obama in the Offing? Please. . .

Ridiculous poster from designyoutrust.com

So, I'm having my best day of the month--the best day in ages really--for readers on the blog. So far this month, I'm doing better for the hits than I have all year, excepting two months. And what do I do? Go on vacation! Yes, after tonight, I'll be away in the far reaches of the heartland (Ohio) for the better part of a week. It always happens like this, make some headway, and piddle it all away.

Still, I have some posts seeded over the next five days, on a time-release pattern. So the blog will not go dark. And if I'm lucky, Stupid Monkey Planet will descend from the canopy, and supply you with some fresh blogitude. Until then, here is a little political morsel for you.

Apparently, there are some in Right Wing World who think a "political coup" against President Barack Obama is "not unrealistic." Now, if Obama was all they alledge him to be, a Marxist, communist, socialist, racist, Hitler-like, Mao-like, Mussolini-like, radical Muslim, I might be able to see their point. But he's not. Not even close. He's just not "their guy," not "their color," and they are pissed off. Good. You're supposed to be. But get your shit together, guys! We put up with it for eight years!

[Excerpt]

Newsmax columnist: Military coup "to resolve the 'Obama problem' " is not "unrealistic"

There is a remote, although gaining, possibility America's military will intervene as a last resort to resolve the "Obama problem." Don't dismiss it as unrealistic.

America isn't the Third World. If a military coup does occur here it will be civilized. That it has never happened doesn't mean it wont. Describing what may be afoot is not to advocate it. . .

Read more at: Media Matters

Virgin Sues a Blogger for an Ad Parody

Image from source, Gawker

Why? It's kind of funny, and the US Airways crash into the Hudson turned out to be a good news story. And why would I risk also getting sued by running the parody? Solidarity. Also, so many people have posted it now. Besides, parodies are allowed. Doesn't Virgin know about the Larry Flynt case?

[Excerpt]

Virgin Sues Blogger Over Fake Ad, Gives Fake Ad Massive Exposure

Virgin is always making those cheeky ads for itself, right? But when a blogger does it in obvious parody style, Virgin sues them. Scrubs. . .

Read more at: Gawker