Homer Simpson Learns the Secrets of Donald Trump's Hair (as a Paid Crowd Member)

First of all, huzzahs to the FOX TV network both for re-securing Harry Shearer for two more years for The Simpsons. Secondly, thanks to The Simpsons for continuing to kick FOX "News" in the shins even while being on FOX TV. And lastly, thanks for this clip which proves--if for no other reason for the sheer number jokes crammed into this clip--that The Simpsons has still GOT it.

Homer Simpson Votes

House Democrats Ask Boner Boehner to Explain Support for DOMA

The badly named "Defense of Marriage Act" (DOMA) is presumed to be un-Constitutional by the Obama Administration. But the John Boner Boehner-lead House of Representatives has decided to defend it anyway. But House Democrats decided to make it an issue. In a statement, they asked,

"As Members who believe that DOMA is unconstitutional and support the President’s decision to stop defending it, we believe that the law is not factually or legally justifiable and were interested in hearing what arguments might possibly be made in its defense."

In response, they got this (non-) answer:

"Following the Department of Justice decision to stop defending a law passed by strong bipartisan majorities in Congress, the Bipartisan Legal Advisory Group voted to retain counsel to defend the law." 

So, much like the past four or five GOP presidential debates, the questions are not really answered.

Read more at: Washington Blade

Homer Simpson's Butt Censored by FOX!!!



Image from source, Huffington Post

 Yes, I'm running two HuffPo-sourced articles in a row, but anyone who knows me knows that I couldn't possibly ignore this story. D'oh!

[Excerpt]

'Simpsons' Head: Fox Won't Let Us Show Homer's Butt



"The Simpsons" celebrated some good news Thursday, as the animated legend was renewed by Fox for an eye-popping 23rd season. While discussing the renewal with New York magazine, Al Jean, who runs the show, revealed an interesting tidbit about the standards department at Fox: they won't let "The Simpsons" show any of the character's bare behinds. . .
 
Read more at: Huffington Post

D'oh! Homer Simpson Marijuana Seized!

Image from Source, CBS News

I think they should've used The Simpsons' bus driver Otto instead of Homer to decorate these wacky tobaccy packages. . .

[Excerpt]

D'oh! Homer Simpson Decorated Pot Seized from Cartel



. . .In the raids, authorities found more than 10,000 color-coded packages, all neatly packed and ready to be shipped off in trucks to various destinations in the United States.



The marijuana was wrapped in silver, grey, yellow and red packages, each with a different logo, which authorities said were meant to identify the area in the United States where the shipments were to be sent. . .

Read more at: CBS News

Thanks to Stupid Monkey Planet for the link.

Science is Cool: Beer Cures Cancer? Woo-Hoo!!!

Image from Around the Sphere

Well, then I just might live forever!

[Excerpt]

Why beer is the latest hope in fight against cancer

It might be your preference to crack open a bottle of red wine at the end of a hard day but you may be better off pouring a pint.

Researchers at the German Cancer Research Centre in Heidelberg have discovered that beer contains a powerful molecule that helps protect against breast and prostate cancers. . .

Read more at: Daily Mail

Homer Simpson Gives David Letterman Top 10 List

Top 10 things Homer's learned in 20 years on television



Yes, The Simpsons has been on for 20 years now. But, since it actually started as a series of short clips on The Tracy Ullman Show, it's been on longer than that. Actually, it's easy for me to remember exactly when--April 19, 1987--because it was my 21st birthday. And I was watching.

The last few years, many fans have complained that the show is tired, and needs to go off the air. These are the same sorts of fans that whined endlessly about how bad Star Trek: Voyager, Star Trek: Enterprise, and the last two seasons of Buffy the Vampire Slayer were. They watch every week, and then complain. I don't get it. I'd agree that somewhere between seasons 10 and 20, The Simpsons wasn't as consistantly funny, and that the number of "classic" episodes were fewer. But the show was still better at its worst than many other shows could ever hope to aspire to. And the transition to HDTV seems to have re-energized the show. Woo-hoo!

The Simpsons Gets a New Opening Sequence

Big deal, you say? Well, except for some tweaks here and there, The Simpsons has had essentially the same opening for 20 years! Of course the chalkboard and couch gags were usually different, but this sequence is a big change. But the biggest change is that the show is now in widescreen high-definition!

Organized Religion Plays the Victim Card

Image from Sydney Morning Herald

Political "conventional wisdom" in this country hurts my logic bone sometimes. Only in America could one group actively lobby to remove another group's civil rights, and then have the former accuse the latter of intolerance and worse when they dare to fight back.

After California voters narrowly passed Proposition 8--the measure that removed the existing right for same-sex couples to marry--it was widely reported that the Mormon Church was responsible for generating half or more of the money that pumped that measure up. Beyond that, there was some help from the Catholic Church, and also some Evangelicals like Focus on the Family and other groups who have hijacked the word "family."

So it is no surprise that when gay people decided to fight back with protests and boycotts, they chose those most responsible for the proposition: organized religion. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (LDS) took the biggest brunt of the backlash, along with individual members who gave money.

I understand that people thought that going after individuals who donated was one step too far. But when those individuals happen to work in areas frequented by gays--a popular restaurant, a movie festival cinema--the reason for that gets much clearer. Why should gays continue to give their dollars to people who used some of those dollars to vote against their civil rights?

And yet, to some, it is not organized religion that is in the wrong here. They are just voting their religious beliefs. For some reason, those beliefs trump both civil rights and the right to fight back in some people's minds. As an agnostic, I have a problem with that. And so does blogger John Aravosis of AmericaBlog, who has his own take on the issue:

[Excerpt]

Is your marriage worth more than a taco?

Oh where to begin.

This time, the victim of the gays is one Margie Christoffersen, until recently the hostess at El Coyote Mexican Cafe, a popular gay hangout in Los Angeles.

You see, poor Margie loves the gays. But now no one likes her because all she did was take the political step of donating $100 in an effort to rip away the marriages of 20,000 of her potential customers, and deny the right to marry to the rest of them, just as Margie's intellectual forefathers did to black and white couples from the 1960s back to slavery. . .

Read more at: AmericaBlog

And here is the article that inspired Aravosis (and me):

[Excerpt]

A life thrown into turmoil by $100 donation for Prop. 8

Margie Christoffersen didn't make it very far into our conversation before she cracked. Chest heaving, tears streaming, she reached for her husband Wayne's hand and then mine, squeezing as if she'd never let go. . .

Read more at: LA Times

Support for Same-sex Marriage Growing

Image from Sydney Morning Herald

While the results of this poll are heartening, I still do not see what "popularity" has to do with civil rights. Giving women and blacks the right to vote wasn't popular. Integrating the military wasn't popular. Eliminating "seperate but equal" wasn't popular. Interracial marriage wasn't popular. We managed to do all of these things without once voting on them, or taking a poll to see if they were "popular" or not.

And before somebody gets bent out of shape for my use of gender and race in my comparison, please remember this: there are gay women, and there are gay African-Americans. Please ask Wanda Sykes if the comparison is valid. Mmmkay?

[Excerpt]

Poll: Support surges for gay marriage

"When voters in California, Florida and Arizona approved measures banning same-sex marriage last month [the graphic at right does not include these latest votes], opponents lamented that the country appeared to be turning increasingly intolerant toward gay and lesbian rights. But the latest NEWSWEEK Poll finds growing public support for gay marriage and civil unions -- and strong backing for the granting of certain rights associated with marriage, to same-sex couples. (Click here to see the full poll.)

Read more at: Raw Story

The Simpsons: Homer's Thanksgiving Prayer

Well, whattaya know, I had time for a post or three! Of course, I'm cheating a bit, using some Thanksgiving Hulu videos, but what the heck. This is a clip from a Thanksgiving episode of The Simpsons, a show no holiday would be complete without a cheeky reference.

It Begins Already: Vote Flipping in West Virginia

Well, ain't this just dandy. West Virginia is one of those pinkish-to strongly red states most of the time, but right now, it is tipping blue. That means, it is trending toward Barack Obama. Early voting has started, but a funny thing is happening there, something familiar. . .

[Excerpt]

Some early W.Va. voters angry over switched votes
Jackson County touch-screens switched votes, 3 residents say

At least three early voters in Jackson County had a hard time voting for candidates they want to win.

Virginia Matheney and Calvin Thomas said touch-screen machines in the county clerk's office in Ripley kept switching their votes from Democratic to Republican candidates.

"When I touched the screen for Barack Obama, the check mark moved from his box to the box indicating a vote for John McCain," said Matheney, who lives in Kenna. . .

Read more at: Gazette-Mail

Remind you of this?

Homer Simpson Tries to Vote for Barack Obama



EDITOR'S NOTE: This clip will likely not stay up for very long, especially considering that it is from a future episode of The Simpsons. Doubly so, since the show and the FOX network are owned by--insert scary music here--Rupert Murdoch!

Homer Simpson Tries to Vote for Barack Obama

Anyone who knows me knows that I couldn't possibly resist posting this video. Now, let's just hope it stays in the realm of comedy, and that Homer's fate doesn't befall the rest of us.


EDITOR'S NOTE: This clip will likely not stay up for very long, especially considering that it is from a future episode of The Simpsons. Doubly so, since the show and the FOX network are owned by--insert scary music here--Rupert Murdoch!

John McCain Stumped by Viagra & Birth Control

Right up front, I'll tell you that this is a silly post. John McCain is asked what he thinks about the fact that insurance covers Viagra, but not birth control. There, McCain goes blank. For a looong time. I kept flashing on The Simpsons, where Homer is trying to concentrate, and instead has a 30s cartoon with organ-grinder music playing in his head.

If I knew how to edit video, I just might have a hit YouTube video on my hands!

California Same-Sex Marriage Brings Out the Kooks

Image from Sydney Morning Herald

And by kooks, I don't mean a Barbra Streisand and a Tina Turner impersonator marrying each other. They're just visually kooky. I mean the real kooks! For instance, from World Net Daily--a source often sited by real news organizations as credible--comes the news that legal same-sex marriage heralds. . .

THE END OF THE WORLD!!!

[Excerpt]

How same-sex marriage points to end of the world

. . .You don't like this possibility? Don't even believe in the Flood? Doesn't matter. Some things are true whether you believe them or not. How can you be sure? There's a way. Did you know that about one-fourth of the Bible is prophecy? A quarter of the Bible is a lot – it's a big book. And did you know God's standard? Perfection. That means that if even one of those prophecies is wrong, you can discount the whole thing. Kind of like a prophet who makes a false prediction – that made him a false prophet and a candidate for stoning. Did you know that 4,000 prophecies in that Bible have already come true down to the last detail. . .

Egad. Color me unconvinced by everything in that paragraph, and in the rest of the article. I'm not at all religious, but to think that the single calamity that will end the world is me legally marrying The Other Half, strikes me as incredibly stupid. This all-powerful God who created everything in the universe cares that we're wearing matching rings? Ludicrous.

But wait, there's more!

Did you know that after same-sex marriage was legalized in California that God himself sent lighting bolts from the sky to. . .

BURN CALIFORNIA FROM THE FACE OF THE EARTH!!!

[Excerpt]

Record Lightning Storm Hits California Following Legalized Gay Marriage

. . .So in just one storm, a record number of fires has been set. The total number of lightning strikes for this storm “more than 5,000″ is equally impressive. Curiously, this fantastic amount of lightning took place the week after a California court legalized Gay Marriage. . .

Gee, God sure has bad aim. Are West Hollywood and San Francisco going up in smoke? No? Hmmm. . .

Read about the end of the world at: World Net Daily

Read about God's mighty bad aim at: Truth in Our Time

California Ballot Measure Could Outlaw ALL Marriage

Image from FOX

Now isn't this an interesting little twist? California's Supreme Court ruled that same-sex couples cannot be treated differently than opposite-sex couples, and must be allowed to marry. Many--including The Other Half and myself intend to do so. In November, a ballot initiative to change the California Constitution will be voted on. It would effectively block any future (and possibly existing?) same-sex marriages.

But here's the wrinkle, folks. They will have nipped one "problem" in the bud, but they've created a whole new one. If same-sex couples are barred from marriage, but the law says that they cannot be treated differently. . .what then? ALL marriages would then become unconstitutional in California! Funny how that works.

[Excerpt]

Calif. Battle Over Gay Marriage Raises Novel Legal Questions

Two things are certain in California's mounting legal showdown over same-sex marriage: Gay couples will wed this month, and, come November, voters will decide whether the state's constitution should exclude them from such unions.

If the vote is yes, the only certainty will be confusion. . .

Read more at: Washington Post

California Spurns Calls to Stop Same-sex Marriages

Image from FOX

Sure, a California state constitutional amendment is going to be up for a vote this fall. And given historical precedent, it is likely to pass--though that is not 100% certain. But in the mean time, starting June 17, same-sex couples will have been getting married for almost five months. And unlike Massachusetts, they can be from anywhere.

So, Californians will be faced with ruling same-sex marriages unconstitutional while thousands of gay couples are already legally married (this writer included). So they'll be forced to nullify existing marriages, grandfather them in, or just reject the amendment. I think you know which one I'm hoping for.

[Excerpt]

State high court refuses to put same-sex ruling on hold

The California Supreme Court refused today to put its ruling allowing same-sex marriages on hold until the issue goes before state voters in November, clearing the way for gay and lesbian weddings to begin June 17.

The justices' unanimous vote to deny a stay sought by two conservative organizations will allow thousands of same-sex couples, from California and other states, to marry before the Nov. 4 vote on a state constitutional amendment that would overturn the ruling. If the amendment passes, the court will have to decide whether those marriage are valid. . .

Read more at: SF Gate

Top 10 Reasons Homer Simpson Should be President

In a recurring theme here on the blog, I am gathering more evidence that Homer Simpson would probably be the choice of America were to run for President. After all, there is no Constitutional prohibition against cartoon characters running, right? The current occupant certainly got in there somehow. Hey, maybe Bush isn't so bad. . .he's just drawn that way!

Homer Simpson for President?

Image from source, News Corpse

It's not as crazy as it sounds. This article from NewsCorpse (a fantastic blog, by the way), lays out a point-by-point case for what America seems to want in a President. And that person would seem to be Homer Simpson.

[Excerpt]

Elitistism And The Presidency: A Handbook For Victory

First and foremost, anyone who purports to be a leader in this environment, must be an avid consumer of beer. This is important to establish one’s credentials as a down to earth representative of commonality and humility. It is also necessary so that voters have a way of indicating their preference for drinking companions. . .

Read more at: NewsCorpse

Pittsburgh Steelers' New Mascot: Steely McBeam

Photo from source, Steelers.com

After listening to the hilariously funny Stephanie Miller Show on an almost daily basis for the last year or so, I thought I'd heard all the McNicknames out there. As a running gag, Steph and the Mooks seem to have one for everybody: Puffy McMoonface (Scott McClellen), Beefy McBratwurst (Dennis Hastert), Tubby McTreason (Karl Rove), Chimpy McFlightsuit/McCokespoon (George W. Bush), and Squeezy McFeelpants (that Senator that wanted to ban sexy cheerleaders).

The Pittsburgh Steelers, after thousands of entries have chosen a new mascot. He's "Steely McBeam," and he looks like one of the steel mill workers from the "Homer's Phobia" episode of The Simpsons. Hey, Steelers, keep reaching for that rainbow!

[Excerpt]

Steelers Announce the Name of New Team Mascot

The Steeler Nation was officially introduced to its newest member today when the team announced the name of its new mascot at the club's training camp at Saint Vincent College in Latrobe, Pa.

Steely McBeam was the winning entry among more than 70,000 names submitted by Steelers fans around the world. He is a contemporized version of the former Steelers logo, a steelworker, representing Pittsburgh's rich history in the steel industry. The logo was used during the 1950s and '60s. . .

Read on at: Steelers.com