Meanwhile on Facebook: Clint Eastwood Cribs from Grandpa Simpson?

Next, Clint Eastwood will go on at length about how he used to wear an onion on his belt during the war. Which was the style at the time. . .


PS. Yes, I know that the original drawing said, "OLD MAN YELLS AT CLOUD," but it's still funny!

Survivor of Giffords Shooting Says She Makes Him "Want to Vomit"

Bitter, party of one. You'd think going through a trauma together would soften your heart a little. This guy sounds like a died-in-the-wool FReeper. You know, basically unreachable.


[Excerpt]

Gabrielle Giffords Makes Tucson Survivor 'Want To Vomit'

A year after the Tucson shootings that left six dead and 13 injured, one of the survivors has strong feelings about the incident and congresswoman and her astronaut husband Mark Kelly.
That feeling is best described as nausea.

"Every time I see them on TV," George Morris, 77, told the Arizona Republic, "it makes me want to vomit. . ."

Read more at: Huffington Post

84-Year-Old Pepper Sprayed Woman Interviewed by Thom Hartmann

Remember the old lady who was pepper sprayed in the face at Occupy Seattle? Well, here she is in her own words.

News of the Weird: Woman Ages from 23 to 73 in Days

Wow. Just wow.

[Excerpt]

Nguyen Thi Phuong, Vietnamese Woman, 'Ages' 50 Years In Days
   



The thought of going from age 23 to age 73 can be pretty daunting, but could you imagine going through the physical 50 year aging process in a matter of days?

Nguyen Thi Phuong was 23 years old when she switched medications to treat an itchy allergic reaction to seafood. A mixture of drugs left her skin sagging and wrinkled in a matter of days. . .

Read more at: Huffington Post

Friday Night Frivolity: When Harry Met Sally 2 w/Billy Crystal & Helen Mirren

Funny or Die isn't always funny, but this time it is. And their ability to draw big stars and famous names is very impressive. When Harry Met Sally is one of those movies you know all about even if you haven't seen it. And this spoof has a pretty funny twist. Way to go, Helen Mirren! She. . .uh. . .sunk her teeth into this one.

When Harry Met Sally 2 with Billy Crystal & Helen Mirren from Billy Crystal

Age: What a Concept

Katherine Helmond gets a lift in
Terry Gilliam's Brazil

This morning, while getting ready for my day, it occurred to me that January is ending, and that February is sort of a big month for the family. My Mom's, Step-dad's and brother-in-law's birthday are in the first three weeks, and the parents are having their fortieth anniversary. They got married when I was four, so that means it has also been forty years since I entered the public school system. Kindergarten in 1971.

My mind--which works like one of Jessica Tate's soliloquies*--hopped from the arrival of February, to important dates, to forty years ago, to omigod in forty more years, I'm going to be really old! If I'm even alive at all!  Then, my mind got a little sad. A little verklempt. I mean, geez, 1971 was a long time ago and everything, but I remember it. Some of it I remember pretty well. And while it's conceivable that I do have forty (or even more) years left--particularly since I quit smoking**--I can't say that for very much longer, can I?

I'm sure that everybody comes to these realizations, and that everyone has their own way of dealing with it. When the future calendar pages can only be realistically read as 20 more years, 10. . .will I really freak out? Or will it just be one of those things you eventually absorb? I suppose I should listen to the more reasonable side of my brain that knows I could die tomorrow (I can't use the "hit by a bus" metaphor. It actually happened to someone I know. Really).  And I'd imagine that at certain ages. . .at least if the body or brain is giving out. . .you might not want to go on for 10 or 20 more years.

One of the more interesting things about aging today, is watching the generation ahead of mine (I'm early Generation X), the Baby Boomers, fight aging tooth and nail. When they hit their 40s and 50s, they didn't automatically get the old lady dress, the grandpa pants, the Brylcreem, the granny hairdo and shawl, like many of their parents did. It didn't hurt that the Boomers were the generation of rock & roll and counter culture. Knocking trends was what they did. Well, that, and plastic surgery became a little more acceptable.

My own parents are still going pretty much full blast all the time. My bosses--two ladies--are Boomers, and they're still going strong. Almost everyone I know born in the forties and fifties defy the image I had of "old people" when I was a kid. Ask most of them, and they probably wouldn't consider themselves old, and might get indignant at the suggestion. Turn on the news, and check out the commercials: Viagra. Boniva. Knee Replacements. Heart medicine. But look closely at all the actors pitching that stuff. Perky Sally Field, butch guys climbing mountains, the studly silver fox and his cougar in side-by-side bathtubs on the beach. Yeah, I don't get that last one either, but you see what I'm getting at. Basically, I'm feeling the same age as the Boomers, and I'm a generation behind them!

What they're probably going to do is, they're going to wear us out. We're going to see a whole generation ahead of us clinging to youth, eventually losing the battle anyway, as we all will. And we Gen-Xers are gonna throw up our hands and say, "why bother!" We'll hitch up our branches to our armpits, get our horn-rimmed glasses with the chain, black socks and sandals. . . It ain't gonna be pretty!

Notes:

* The Katherine Helmond character on Soap always talked in a verbial hopscotch: "I know what I know, but I don't know what I don't know, but I do know that I don't know. You know?" What's more, there's a Benson character in my head too, and he understands.

** Wrapping up 28 days! Woohoo!  Pass the cold turkey, who says it can't be done.

Daily Show: John McCain, Grumpy Old Man

You kids get off my lawn!

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SNL Digital Short: "Boombox"

It's not often these days that I'm laughing at Saturday Night Live. I watch it out of habit or muscle memory or something. I mean, the actors are mostly good, and capable of pulling laughs out of me. But SNL, what is up with the writing these days? The show has always been spotty-- as I suppose every sketch comedy show is--but lately the hit to miss ratio is very heavy to the miss side. Still, there were a few chuckle-worthy moments in last night's show, chief among them the SNL Digital Short, Andy Samberg's regular feature.

The digital shorts are usually musical, usually a bit twisted, maybe a little gross. . .but they have a much higher "hit" factor than the rest of the show. "Boombox" is about a song so good it makes people dance uncontrollably. . .and old people. . .well. . .Just watch!

George W. Bush: How He Aged in Office

President Bush has often said that he sleeps well at night, that's he's proud of his Presidency, and didn't let the job get him down. Despite the peculiarity of not letting so many mistakes and failures bother him, you can on one hand believe it. We've all seen him dancing, and goofing around, looking like he doesn't have a care in the world (or a thought in his head).

But on the other hand, there is no doubt that this man has aged dramatically while in office. Now, almost every time a president leaves office, there are stories about how badly the one in question has aged. Carter, Reagan, Clinton; all looked like more time had passed on their faces then on the calendar. And I know I'm not the first--and won't be the last--to comment on this regarding Gee Dubya. But, man that guy looks 20--not eight--years older now. So why does Dick Cheney still look the same?

Alzheimer's Disease Linked to Fast Food?

Photo from source, Reuters

And here, I thought that William Shatner's "Mad Cow" disease on Boston Legal was just a joke. . .

[Excerpt]

Research on mice links fast food to Alzheimer's

Mice fed junk food for nine months showed signs of developing the abnormal brain tangles strongly associated with Alzheimer's disease, a Swedish researcher said on Friday.

The findings, which come from a series of published papers by a researcher at Sweden's Karolinska Institutet, show how a diet rich in fat, sugar and cholesterol could increase the risk of the most common type of dementia. . .

Read more at: Reuters

McCain Has a Memory Lapse on Meet the Press

It's not nice to make fun of a person's age, or take pleasure in another person's brain fart. Oh, who am I kidding, it can be fun, it just isn't nice. But it's too easy. And there is a cut-off age somewhere north of sixty where age jokes move from funny to mean, unless made by the older person themselves.

But when that older person is running for President, and has released their voluminous health records in only the most cursory (and unusual) way, a memory lapse is worth examining. And not just the lapse, but the way you are shown to deal with it. This is from this morning's Meet the Press on NBC.

Barack Obama to Halt Campaign to Visit Ailing Grandmother

Photo from source, MSNBC

Yikes. The breaking news in the last few minutes says that Barack Obama will be "suspending" his campaign (or at least his own participation in it) later this week to visit his ailing grandmother, whose health has taken a turn for the worse. I can't imagine that there is a particular downside to this, but in our wacky political environment, who knows?

I would think that John McCain would likely issue a very hasty "we wish the Obama family well" type statement. It remains to be seen whether they'll halt their "pallin' around with terrorists" rhetoric, or if they'll somehow try to turn this to their advantage. So, while it is a dicey proposition to pull out of your own campaign in the last two weeks, it is equally so to try to use such a serious event to either side's advantage.

Here's hoping his grandmother has a turnaround, and that the politics can be reigned in for a time.

[Excerpt]

Obama to take break to see sick grandmother

Democrat presidential candidate Barack Obama is canceling nearly all his campaign events Thursday and Friday to fly to Hawaii to visit his suddenly ill 85-year-old grandmother, his spokesman said. . .

Read more at: MSNBC

New Barack Obama Ad: It Gets Worse

One of the largest constituencies for John McCain is older people. But McCain's health care plan, if examined, would turn many older Americans against him. Wisely, Barack Obama is pointing this out in his latest ad. Check it out.

New Obama Ad: McCain Out of Touch

Barack Obama is pulling fewer punches these days. And while Senator Droopy Dog Joe Lieberman may characterize this ad as a "personal attack," I'm not sure the elecorate will feel that way. Take a look:

John McCain Gets Lost on Stage; And What's With His Face?

The news started out funny. John McCain bumbles around, trying to find his way off the stage at an event. It was kind of like Kathy Griffin's imitation of Paris Hilton in the same situation--without the posing.



Then, the bloggers at AmericaBlog noticed that something weird happened to John McCain's face, right before he got "lost."



So, what gives? Just a tic? Nerve damage from his skin cancer surgery? Something worse? It's worth a ponder.

AmericaBlog has lots more.

Sam Donaldson Revives McCain "Age" Issue

I got up early this morning to see The Other Half off on a trip, and then trundled into the TV room to watch the Sunday morning political talk shows. Ugh. Borrrrring would be putting it lightly. Were it not for my five cups of coffee, I never would have made it.

Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson was on every show I watched, and the only thing I remember about him? That he has an unfortunate "tic." When he finishes a thought, he tightens his mouth into an "O" and then licks around the circle. The word creepy doesn't do it justice.

Then, I saw Michael Bloomberg, and really couldn't glean much, except that he has a massive ego. And he has his own tic; a raised, clenched left hand, with his index finger doing a little "world's smallest violin" maneuver. Maybe it was just me this morning, but I just couldn't focus on what anybody was saying. But then, I didn't get to watch This Week with George Stephanopoulos on ABC due to pre-emption.

Catching this clip on YouTube, I realize that I missed the only interesting part of all of the shows. Sam Donaldson calling out John McCain for his age? Whoa!

John McCain Befuddled at Press Conference

This video shows three camera angles of the same question. I wondered at first, why would they do that? And by the first few seconds of angle #3, I had my answer. John McCain looks absolutely lost, befuddled. He's groping for an answer, "All right. Um. . .first of all. . .um. . . . . . .the first quest. . .you said. . .why am I?" I was expecting a General Stockdale, "Who am I? Why am I here?" question next!



From AmericaBlog, via The Jed Report.

McCain: When Does Age Become an Issue?

Image from source, Wall Street Journal

Age is a very dicey subject to cover. For one thing--if we're lucky--one day we will all get old and anything we've said in the past might come back to haunt us. For me, making fun of somebody's age can be fun. . .up to a point. Everybody likes to rib their friend who's turned 30, 40 or 50. But 60, 70 or 80 are more like celebrations--yay! You made it! Age digs lose their humor.

Outside of the humor realm, there are practical situations where age becomes an issue. Many people have suggested mandatory retesting for drivers' licenses after a certain age. Pilots have mandatory retirement ages. People dispute the cut-off ages, but everyone realizes that you don't stay sharp forever. Now, what about the office of the President?

I am not about to make some sort of proclamation that John McCain is too old. I'm just going to make a couple of observations. First, I know a few 70+ year-olds. Some are robust, and sharp as a tack. Some are starting to fade. Whatever you may say about McCain, he is not a young 72. Also, from reviewing video and written accounts of his 2000 bid for the Presidency, he is quite a different man today. I don't know if this issue can be dealt with easily. But if McCain is slipping, do we just ignore it?

[Excerpt]

Is John McCain Stupid?

Is John McCain losing it?

On Sunday, he said on national television that to solve Social Security "everything's on the table," which of course means raising payroll taxes. On July 7 in Denver he said: "Senator Obama will raise your taxes. I won't."

This isn't a flip-flop. It's a sex-change operation.

Read more at: Wall Street Journal

FOX "News" Using Old Footage So McCain Looks Younger

Image by Editor

Really? Good grief.

[Excerpt]

MSNBC beats on Fox for its 'anti-aging fix' for McCain

MSNBC's Dan Abrams was all smiles on Thursday as he aired what he described as proof of Fox News going over the line in an attempt to make Republican presidential candidate John McCain look good.

"If you have any question whether Fox News is in the tank for McCain," exclaimed Abrams, "this should wipe any doubt from your mind. Fox is actually trying to make John McCain look younger."

Read more at: Raw Story

Robert Novak Hits Pedestrian, Doesn't Notice

Photo from source, Politico

Have you ever been drawn into one of those discussions about there being an cutoff age for driving? I've always thought it sounded mean, but maybe there ought to be at least some kind of retesting after a certain age.

Case in point, reporter (and CIA covert operative cover blower) Robert Novak, 77, hit a guy in a crosswalk today. He was tooling around in his black Corvette, and plowed into a guy who had a "WALK" sign in his favor, reportedly bouncing him off the windshield. And Novak just kept going like nothing happened. How do you not notice something like that?

Of course, he may have been lying, and had simply planned on hitting and running. I've got to say, the cops seem to have let the old guy off easy. Certainly easier than they'd treat most hit-and-run drivers, don't you think?

[Excerpt]

Novak cited after hitting pedestrian

Syndicated columnist Robert D. Novak was cited by police after he hit a pedestrian with his black Corvette in downtown Washington, D.C., on Wednesday morning. . .

Read more (with video) at: Politico