Dorks! In Alaska! (A Rocky Mountain Mike Song Parody)

The drunken, bloody Palin family brawl has been a gift from the comedy gods. And true to form, Rocky Mountain Mike has packed it all  into a superb song parody! To the tune of North to Alaska by Johnny Horton, naturally. For more Rocky Mountain Mike, go here.
 

Tom DeLay is Back, and He's. . .A Dominionist?

Maybe this should be filed under Halloween Horrors with the previous Michael Jackson videos. Tom DeLay, the personification of GOP hubris somehow got sprung from the pokey (I'm still unclear on exactly how he didn't belong in jail), and apparently has decided to make a comeback. Or something. But while he always had an extremely irritating air about him, and you could easily imagine him being pious, his focus was more on the political side. Now, it looks like he's blended his Jesus crystals with his politics, and mmm, mmm, made a tasty concoction of bullshit.

God and Jesus didn't write the Constitution. America is not a Christian nation. And Tom DeLay should know that. Then again, considering his propensity for bullshit, he's probably just selling more overtly to the same crowd that ate it up before. And is it me, or does he sound just as drunk as ever?

[Excerpt]

DeLay: 'God Created This Nation And God Created The Constitution'



During a service last weekend, John Hagee spent a half hour interviewing former House Majority Leader Tom DeLay during which DeLay revealed that God has commissioned him to write a book and promised him that he'll play a role in the coming spiritual revival. . .

Read more at: Right Wing Watch

John Boehner (Barely) Holds On to Speakership

Image found at NoTeaPartyToday

Well the weeping, orange boner gets to keep his job. Even though the 112th Congress was less effective than the infamous "Do Nothing Congress" of 1948. Even though he's a perpetually drunken (allegedly), oafish clown. It wasn't in the bag though. He had some defectors, and only got in by two votes. I'd say, "no wonder he cried in his acceptance speech," but by now it would be weirder if he didn't.

[Excerpt]

Boehner reelected as Speaker; nine Republicans defect in vote

Rep. John Boehner (R-Ohio) was reelected Speaker of the House on Thursday after a week of rumors of a possible GOP revolt.

Boehner won a bare majority in a vote that saw nine Republicans vote for other GOP members, and several others who abstained from voting or voted "present." Two years ago, Boehner won all 241 available GOP votes. . .

Read more: The Hill

Rick Perry Challenges Nancy Pelosi to a Debate

Seriously. Does he have a problem that 12 steps
could help? Image from source, The Hill.

Oh, for pete's sake, why?

[Excerpt]

EXCLUSIVE: Perry challenges Pelosi to debate

Dear Leader Pelosi,

After reading about House Minority Whip Steny Hoyers' outburst over my "Overhauling Washington" plan, I wonder if his obstructionism reflects your own opposition and that of the Democratic Caucus to urgent reforms the American public so vehemently demand. . .


Read more at: The Hill

Rick Perry Attempts to Explain Bizarre Speech

Oh, my word, and we called Bush a chimp. Image from Huffington Post

Did you watch Rick Perry's oh-so-very odd speech the other day? Well, go do it, I'll wait. Dum de dummmm. . .

So, what do you think? Was he high? Drunk? Did his inner Marcus Bachmann somehow come out? Maybe he just really likes syrup? Most people were at a loss of how to even describe it, which is why I just asked you to go watch it. You just have to see it.

Well, finally, Mr. Perry is trying to explain himself. He says he wasn't drunk or taking drugs. So he was basically being himself then? Isn't that worse?

[Excerpt]
  
Rick Perry New Hampshire Speech: GOP Candidate Denies Drinking, Using Painkillers

"I've probably given 1,000 speeches. There are some that have been probably boring, some that have been animated, some that have been in between," he said to the Chronicle before two Silicon Valley fundraisers. He also called the speech "pretty typical for me. . ."

Read more at: Huffington Post

Impulsive Me (Or, Why PayPal Should Have a Breathalyzer)

Once a year or so, I get the itch for a big-ticket purchase. Sometimes, I go years without scratching it. In 2006 it was a big French-door refrigerator. In 2007, it was a range, microwave and dishwasher. In 2008 and 2009, I cooled my jets (though there was a new computer in there somewhere). In 2010, even in these economic times, I got a new car, but the old one was eleven years old, and I'd owned it for nine. So that was not particularly uncalled for.

As recently as mid-2010, I got some "found money" of about $650 that wasn't expected, and I really couldn't think of a thing I wanted, and I just put in in the bank. Well, it's spent now! On Friday night, after a night of food, drinks, games and more drinks at a friend's house, I came home and sloshed into my desk chair. When checking my email, I came upon a Google alert that I have set for a particular model of HDTV that I've had my eye on. See, our old HDTV (yes, they've been around long enough to be old) was purchased for $2000 or so in 2004. It still works, but not without quirks. The panel on the front doesn't work, so you have to use the remote at all times. The picture has lost much of its clarity and some of its brightness. There are bars burned in on the sides from 4:3 shows. And when the picture is filled with a light color, you can make out "MSNBC" burned in at the bottom!

Mitsubishi WD-60738, my new toy

Anyway, I've sort of been wishing for my TV to die, so that I could justify the purchase of another. But it keeps hanging in there! And then I got that email alert on Friday night. It wasn't the first. I've let several of them go by. But this time, it was exactly the set I wanted, it was about half the price the set goes for at RC Willey or Fry's, it was tax free, and had no shipping charge! If I'd waited for a sale here in town, I doubt I'd have gotten it even close to that price, I'd have had to pay tax, and would have had to figure out a way to get it home. Filled to the gills with red wine as I was, there was none of my usual pragmatism to worry about, so CLICK! Right on that PayPal button!

So, sometime in the next week or so, we'll be wheeling the old 55" Mitsubishi (all 4-foot by 4 1/2-foot by 2 foot of it) out to the garage, awaiting a friend who's going to use it for salvage. Then, I have to find a piece of furniture to set the new one on, since it doesn't have a base. Then, I have to figure out where to put the cable box, Blu-ray player, center speaker, right speaker, receiver and cd player. Oy. I always forget how much work new stuff is when I'm lusting over it! But the good news is, my total cost for the new set was about a third the price of the set it's replacing.

Holiday Cheer: Bad Santa Drunkenly Staggers Through Parking Garage

It's a little early for Holiday Cheer posts, I'll grant you.  And it looks like Santa has had a little too much holiday cheer.  This video has probably been seen by most people who want to see it. But I don't have time to post until the evening hours, and I couldn't resist this one. It is surely bad karma to laugh at another person's misfortune. But just try not to.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer's Xander Drunk and Disorderly

Image from source, Examiner

Not Xander! Surely, somebody conjured a demon (probably Dawn, probably by mistake--stupid Dawn!) that possessed him, and caused him to react badly. Giles will soon crack the case, and Xander will be no worse for wear. Or, Nicholas Brendon will go to rehab (again), and the cycle repeats.

[Excerpt]

Buffy the Vampire Slayer star arrested for drunk and disorderly incident

Television actor Nicholas Brendon, who starred on the hit series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer," was forcibly subdued and arrested by police during a violent altercation.

According to law enforcement officers in Venice, California, the 38-year old actor provoked officers into using a stun gun when Brendon allegedly attempted to strike the arresting officers. At the time and place of occurrence the 38-year-old actor was reportedly drunk and boisterous on Wednesday night, which prompted residents to call the police. . .

Read more at: Examiner

Tom DeLay: Drunk or Not?

The very first time I ever saw Tom DeLay, I didn't even know what party he belonged to. But I could tell I didn't much like him. Lots of swagger, evangelist hair. . .just yuck. Turned out my instincts were were right, and he is kind of a jerk. Minus the "kind of."

Well, it turns out ol' Tom is a birther. And quite possibly drunk too. On Hardball with Chris Matthews, DeLay slurs through the whole bit, and then says "gift certificate" when he means "birth certificate." You tell me, is The Hammer hammered?

What's Up With (Still) President Bush's Jaw?

I've mentioned this before, the weird jaw-wiggle that (still) President George W. Bush does after he completes a sentence. It's a strange, distracting thing, once you start to notice it. John Boehner has a similar thing, tensing back the corners of his mouth repeatedly. When you clue into it, you notice almost nothing else.

But Boehner's grimace is pretty obviously a facial tic. He's probably not aware he's doing it. Bush's looks more serious than that. It's a waggle more than a wiggle, a jut outward and to the left. It alternates with tightly pursed lips. What the hell does that to his face? Is his slurred (schlurrred) speech part of the problem? And why does it come and go from speech to speech? Is he just drunk? Medicated? Is it a holdover from his cocaine-binge days? This just bugs me. I hate unsolved mysteries.

Slurred speech 'n' coke jaw, before a captive audience at Fort Campbell. Junior's RIPPED.



Found at: Democratic Underground

Is Bush Drinking Again?

Image from source, NewsCorpse

Maybe this should be filed under "Shameless Gossip," but I've never been 100% convinced that our "reformed alcoholic" President has ever been entirely off of the sauce. Periodic drunkenness would go a long way to explaining his idiotic behavior, wouldn't it?

[Excerpt]

Bush: Back On The Bottle?

The national embarrassment that is our president once again raises its reddened face. In photographs from the Olympics in China, it appears that recovering souse, George W. Bush, is relapsing. . .

Read more at: NewsCorpse

Young Turks on Bush's Hidden Camera Moment

The other day, I posted a video taken of George W. Bush by a hidden camera (camera phone?). In it, he used uncharacteristically frank language about the mortgage crisis, and used inappropriate humor. Here, Cenk Uygur of The Young Turks breaks it down for us. Better than I did.

Hillary Clinton Slinging Back Whiskey

Photo from source, This is London

Posted mostly for the picture, and the hope that she's getting all relaxed because she's done fighting?

[Excerpt]

One for the end of the road? Merry Clinton knocks back whisky on campaign plane

Hillary Clinton took time out from her punishing campaign schedule to enjoy a glass of whiskey with a group of journalists.

The Democratic presidential hopeful was flying back from Rapid City in South Dakota, one of the few states yet to hold its primary when she decided to let her hair down a little.

Her relaxed mood may give rise to speculation she is preparing to concede to her Democratic rival Barak Obama. . .

Read more at: This is London

Bush Gives Umpteenth Iraq "Progress" Report

Picture captured from video at source, Washington Post

I sometimes wonder if George W. Bush has been replaced by an automaton, programmed to go out and say the same thing over and over again about a given topic. Something like the "Buffybot" on Buffy the Vampire Slayer, or Superman's legion of robots. . .only dumber.

The only thing that blasts a hole in that theory is that it looks like The Decider has a little wound over his left eyebrow. Maybe he took a header into the coffee table after too many "near beers." He does seem to have that overly annunciated "s" and "sts" sound at the end of his words. I'm just sayin'. . .

[Excerpt]

Despite New Violence in Iraq, Bush Stresses Progress

The images from Baghdad and Basra bristled with explosions, burning buildings, angry street protests, rocket smoke wafting from the Green Zone. The words from Dayton were "remarkable" and "victory" and "rebirth."

"Normalcy," President Bush said, "is returning back to Iraq."

If you can take it, there's more (with video) at: Washington Post