National Enquirer Fingers John Boehner for Extramarital Affair

John Boner Boehner's last name may become even funnier than it already is. Boehner is already such a clown-car full of comedy gold: his skin is orange, he cries profusely, he's seemingly permanently drunk, he has a disturbing facial tic, he shouts, "Hell no, you can't!!!"  What else could he do to draw the attention of late night comics, liberal bloggers and political enemies? Well, possibly stick his Boehner were he shouldn't. . .